bash.org archive

<Richad34> Oy I had a bad night
<Richad34> I couldn't sleep, and had no idea what to do. My
parents are still awake, it was midnight, and I was bored.
<Richad34> So then I remembered that I had a drama
presentation the next class and I played a rich guy so I
needed a suit.
<Richad34> I take out my suit, and get dressed. You know, the
works. I even took out my top hat and my cane.
<Richad34> Now it gets a little weird. I had to go downstairs
in order to see how I looked as it's the only place with a
full body mirror. My parents sleep on the same floor as me so
I didn't want to wake them up.
<Richad34> So I got this idea. I decided to turn on my TV so
that my parents thought people were talking outside, and my
footsteps would be noises they were making. I thought it would
work, I was tired.
<Richad34> I ran downstairs, checked myself out. I looked
fine, so I went back into my room
<Richad34> Now by then the running in a suit had made me kind
of itchy (down south), so I quickly undo my pants and release
what was stuck and to relieve my itch with my hand.
<Richad34> And my mom opens the door to the room and all I do
is freeze in surprise
<Richad34> I don't know what she was thinking, but I can tell
you the following
<Richad34> It was midnight, I was in a suit and top hat, and I
appeared to be jacking off to George from Seinfeld.
<Richad34> And my mom just stood there in disbelief
<Richad34> I can't tell you what ensued, but it involved
attempted exorcism and lots of crying
<Richad34> Best night ever