#834654 + (4667)
lemonlimeskull: Keith dodged a serious bullet thanks to his
massive stupidity.
Opium: Hmm?
lemonlimeskull: Well, as you may know he lost his license
months ago
lemonlimeskull: So he's been biking everywhere, which has lead
to him losing a bunch of weight
lemonlimeskull: He bikes to Walmart today and as soon as he
gets to the electronics department, realizes his wallet's
fallen out, probably somewhere along the highway.
lemonlimeskull: So he takes the memory card he wanted, puts it
up in his baggy sleeve, and goes to leave.
killjay: Uh oh
lemonlimeskull: Yeah.
lemonlimeskull: Naturally, security stops him as he gets
within 5 feet of the front doors. This huge obese woman who is
obviously having a really bad day - or just hates her job.
killjay: o shit
lemonlimeskull: She stops him, GRABS his arm, RIPS up his
sleeve, and WRENCHES the card out of his hand.
lemonlimeskull: He knows he's screwed so he starts crying in
the middle of the fucking store. He cries all the way back to
the security office, and everyone's staring at him the whole
way.
Opium: So he's sitting in jail right now
lemonlimeskull: That's the awesome part. The manager takes a
look at him, notices the bike helmet, poorly fitting clothes,
lack of any ID whatsoever, and the fact that he's crying like
a three year old.
killjay: .... -_-
lemonlimeskull: Yes. He was let go and the security woman got
chewed out for hurting a "retarded kid".