bash.org archive

[+Freeder] The Angry Dragon
[+Freeder] Immediately after you blow your load in a girl's
mouth, smack the back of her head and make it come out her
nose. When she gets up she'll look like an angry dragon.

<grendel> whoah leasbian schoolgirl porn
<grendel> oh wait tatu video...

<CompGod> If crime doesn't pay, is my job illegal?

(@Hektik) once i saw my grandparents have sex and thats why i
dont eat rasins

<ecoli> i remember the girl who lived next to mea
<ecoli> and we saw pictures in my dad's uh. magazines.
<ecoli> "THAT LOOKS LIKE FUN, LET'S TRY THAT."
<ecoli> i think that was also her first golden shower
experience, heh.   at that age, i figured that was the only
liquid that came out of there.

<nae> will you guys PLZZ stop that?
<nae> are there any mods around that can ban them plz?
<@Athene> nae: what is the problem?
<nae> correct me if i'm wrong but isn't this channel for d/l?
<@Athene> no, this is a chat channel
<nae> isn't htere any law against spamming?
<nae> slyspy hold 1 out of every two messages in here!
<@slyspy> nothing unusual in that
<@Athene> that is called a conversation
<@Athene> maybe you have had one before
<@Athene> or at least seen them in movies ;)
<nae> then can you plz convirsate in a new chat??? cause it
blocks 0.7 of my d/l's speed!

<Slyfox> I want to make a FPS that mixes the geo-mod
techonology of Red Faction, the finesse and action of Max
Payne, the gore and damage map feature in Soldier of Fortune,
and the story and intrigue of Half-Life.  I'll call it "Can't
Fuck With This".

DaLady Firestorm: and drinking my tea
Laketh 69: teabag?
DaLady Firestorm: I like tea
DaLady Firestorm: and yes, there is a tea bag in my drink
right now
Laketh 69: lol
DaLady Firestorm: why do you ask
Laketh 69: .......
Laketh 69: teabag ;(
DaLady Firestorm: do I want to know
DaLady Firestorm: what's the fixation with teabag
Laketh 69: is when you stick your balls into a girls mouth
DaLady Firestorm: did you have a pet tebag...
DaLady Firestorm: ...ah...
DaLady Firestorm: okay, that explains it
DaLady Firestorm: ew...
Laketh 69: duh
Laketh 69: and u like teabags
DaLady Firestorm: I like tea
DaLady Firestorm: not the bags
DaLady Firestorm: or sacs
DaLady Firestorm: or whatever
Laketh 69: the bags make the tea
DaLady Firestorm: I like what comes out of the tea bags
DaLady Firestorm: oh, wait a second

<kisama> just leave clues as to your modem
<kisama> motive*

<Farcaller> to get spare parts disassemble/assemble some
device
<Farcaller> repeat until you get enough spare parts

<KRS922> Boy who go to bed with sex problem wake up with
solution in hand.

<_Hobbes|Stoned> I can't help but wonder if someday I'll look
back on all of this and shudder to think that it's all logged

<Mike> ARGH SHIT
<Mike> Ive been on the internet for ALMOST 3 HOURS
<Mike> SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSHITE
<Mike> BIG HUGE PHONE BILL
<Mike> bye bye everyone
*** Mike ([email protected]) Quit (Quit: Mike is Gone, Nobody
Noticed)
<Jumper> heh
<Jumper> "phone"

<nailhead> Ya, How come there's albinos in all races but
theres no ppl that are
the opposeite? like "alblackos" or sumpin?

<Grumman> man, tough week for my fantasy hockey team
<JustNoodle> any luck with your fantasy sex life?

<Focusyn> hmm there are chicks on my floor named Johnnie,
Scott and Brett
<@SJr|Tecra> tell them that after the operations they are
suppose to pick girls names.

<Toasted> and I just found an unopened box of nerds under my
bed while cleaning out my dormroom
<Toasted> I don't know whether to be horrified or ecstatic
<mahnchowder> eat them.  report back if you suffer any ill
effects.
<Toasted> already eating

<Shino> scientists are going to make a blue rose with new
breakthroughs in biotechnology.. our tax dollars at work!!!
<Shino> I guess they got bored of the cancer thing......

(@atarax) People act like 9/11 was some big thing, it's not
like they crashed EFnet or anything.

<vanguard> i lie awake at night
<vanguard> thinking about how one day
<vanguard> buy some chance of dumb luck
<Redback> you will write your whole story on one line?

<-- Matias has quit (Exit: Some people are like Slinkies . . .
not really good for anything, but you still can't help but
smile when you see one tumble down the stairs)

--- [signoff!#windowmaker] NinjaCodr (wife getting naked)

puffster: Can you really start a sentence with "With almost
100% accuracy..."?
killdbykangeroos: I think I'm positive you can.

<n00dle> What do Michael Jackson and a Big Mac have in common?
<n00dle> Both involve 30-year-old meat in between two
nine-year-old buns.

<Thund3r> I just thought of something ... since its year of
the monkey does that mean GW Bush will get re-elected?

<tak> if i move to canada ill be so rich
<tak> cause your money sucks
<disco-stu> yep
<disco-stu> but at least our country doesnt!
<tak> haha
<Ped> haha
<vivid> haha
<aj> haha
<blakangel> haha

<Tre`> I've got to find away to earn some dough
<bishoptl> sell some sperm. that's legal in the States, isn't
it?
<bishoptl> or plasma - that should free up some $$$
<SHD> he's too young for selling sperm
<Tre`> I need *a bunch*
<bishoptl> sell your friends' sperm
<Tre`> that's just disgusting
<bishoptl> how badly do you want NWN
<bishoptl> I'm not saying you have to go milk them yourself
<bishoptl> just pass around the tupperware container

<@Patrick> well damn
<@Patrick> this map says 1 inch = 4 miles
<@Patrick> and i dont have a fucking ruler
<@Patrick> ill use my dick

<I3aH> can anyone help me? i need to get wine working
<CyberdogM8> just drink more of it 
<CyberdogM8> it'll work eventually

<timmo> they need to make a 41oz
<timmo> so you can poor 1 oz to the dead homies
<timmo> and drink the 40

<+ParaBytes> i have this weird problem
<+GoodScrat> rub vasoline on it and don't play with it for a
week

<PamelaPeaks> man my assistant is eating some weird ass
sausage that smells like farts
<rooster> hrm
<dedd[afk]> yummy
<rooster> weird "ass sausages"
<rooster> or weird ass "sausages"

<downer> who is you?
<Sarpedon> yo mama
<Sarpedon> oh wait... i'm sorry
<Sarpedon> i often confuse myself WITH PEOPLE I FUCK

<McMoo> i think there's a vacuum cleaner thief in the
neighborshood
<McMoo> i wake up to a knocking on the door
<McMoo> some aZn woman is there
<McMoo> 'hi, i live down in 114. do you by any chance have a
vacuum i could borrow?'
<McMoo> i'm not even sure there is a 114 in our building
<McMoo> and she's been vacuuming for a while now.

<Hayd1488> Any Intelligent Women here?
<grovibtch> yeah
<grovibtch> but they're not dumb enough to msg u

<jamesm> good porn would be a chick taking it up the arse
while configuring a dns server
<jamesm> the guy could do a zone transfer to her secondary
<jamesm> if you know what i mean

<`Riku> Ok, so there's this UN meeting, and there are a lot of
important people in there discussing how to get a peace in
Iraq
<`Riku> after the meeting the President of France comes to
George Bush and says: "Mr. Bush, there's something I'd like to
ask... My son is a huge Star Trek fan, and he'd like to know
why there are no Arabians on the show?"
<`Riku> Bush thinks a second, then smirks and says;
<`Riku> "Cause it takes place in the future."

<aNuBiS-> i like my women like i like my roads... flat and
well traveled

<@helloraj> if ya rape a positute would u get arrested for
stealing?

<Myrmidon> Why do Windows have a feature called Sticky Keys
when I can do it myself ?

<jcm> would having a woman as the main character change
anything?
<jcm> it would still be GTA
<gwizz> yeah
<gwizz> grand theft alimony

<moira> I converted an MP3 to ogg, then back again, and then
back and forth between MP3 and OGG format thirty times, and
when I listened to it after that, it was just an mp3 of you
guys talking

<whoreee> i just ordered the explosion self titled CD single?
<Weeve> what's it called?

<Schatten|DRUNK> I think 'strong' describes the Akira
soundtrack best.
<ignatios> or "Japanese"
<Schatten|DRUNK> shut up

<[K]orangeboy> nah, i live in wales, which is like the dirty
retarded cousin that lives chained in the basement of the uk

<finneas> the only good thing tom green has been in is drew
berrymore

<pvx> why do these psycho's always msg my bot?
<xf> Because that is what psychos do.
<MenTaLguY> more to the point, why do a majority of them seem
to be from Brazil?
<xf> Because that is where psychos live.

*** Joins: root ([email protected])

(nexxai) holy fuck...I was just reading a ton of IRC quotes,
then got up, and it was like I entered a new dimension
(nexxai) reality.....it's weirder than you think.

*** SyKnight ([email protected]) has joined
the channel
<UrbnLgnd> :)
*** SyKnight has left the channel
<UrbnLgnd> i guess I have an ugly face

<HORNYFAQR>: im afraid one of the kindergardeners is hitting
on me now
<Hades Dragoon>: ...
<HORNYFAQR>: he's giving me winks and eye raises
<HORNYFAQR>: i'm scared
<Hades Dragoon>: he's gonna take you in the night
<Hades Dragoon>: he's following you as we speak
<HORNYFAQR>: well none of them know where i live
<Hades Dragoon>: that's why he's following you

<amit> I DO THIS FOR ALLAH!
<FBI> we have Allah in a secure facility

<ash26> tip
<ash26> never call yourself an american in england
<ash26> claim your canadian
<ash26> it will be so much easier for you

<TheMage> xfiles was good
<TheMage> best one for a while
<Pupazz> xfiles? Fuck that got gay so fast.
<TheMage> Pupazz: it's not as good as when they had mulder,
but it's still good
<Pupazz> TheMage: Actualy, I was gay BEFORE mulder left....
<D_Radio> you were gay?
<Pupazz> .....
<Pupazz> Fuck.

<Legal18f> yet they insist on a/s/l!
<smarm> hehe
<Legal18f> Isn't it obvious by my nick that I'm a 21 year old
male?

* IllIIIllI ([email protected]) has joined #suicide
<IllIIIllI> any slut attention whores here need a man to make
themselves feel important let me know i can be that guy if you
aren't ugly/fat
* IllIIIllI ([email protected]) has left #suicide

customer24601: what's that sound?
macholyoke: me banging my head against my desk.
customer24601: why are you banging your head against the desk.
macholyoke: so I can speak to you in terms you'll understand,
you retard.

*** BlackDeth ([email protected]) has joined #
snogs
<tyne> uh
<tyne> who are u?
<matts> BlackDeth on #snogs @#songs
<BlackDeth> hypr told me to do it
<BlackDeth> i dont know how well you guys know him
<BlackDeth> but you probably realize he isn't the greatest
typer/speller!
<matts> HAHAHA
<hypr> shut up flamer
<BlackDeth> so i joined #songs first when he said #snogs

<Duo> I paint stripes on my pc, and it makes me feel it can go
faster

<gedamo> Some of our customers used to call their computer
boxes the "brain" and it led tothem calling up saying things
like "My brain isn'tworking"

<some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
<some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
<some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
<Quintus> let me get this straight
<some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
<some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
<some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
<Quintus> if i understand you correctly
<some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
<some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
<some_big_boobs> YOU'RE GAY
<Quintus> two words, two syllables, sounds like..

<Kurushimi> Ö_ö
<SyntaxGlitch> ...Kuru, kindly shave those eyebrows off. They
offend me.

ohnoitschris: White Castle: The OTHER guilty pleasure that
makes you scream in the bathroom
ohnoitschris: ...
ohnoitschris: I am so sorry.

<blazemore> in afghanistan, people are worried about dying
tonight. in the us, i'm worried about completing my mame
collection before this site rom site dies.

<lb-> They kept telling me I couldn't talk to a doctor.
<lb-> I was like "Well, I drank a good amount of my own pee.
I'D LIKE TO SPEAK TO A FUCKING DOCTOR."

<|Rain|> whoa neat
<|Rain|> the windows 2000 background has a silhouette of a man
jumping off a building from frustration

<Jimmothi> damint
<Jimmothi> i drew on some plastic
<Jimmothi> then it rubbed off on my hand
<Jimmothi> i never noticed and slept on it and now its all up
my face and ear
<Jimmothi> i look like a smurf gave me a facial

<Kyre> ...
<GreenFux> ...?
<Kyre> I'm re-enacting Final Fantasy 8
<Kyre> err I mean ...

<Kerf> had an argument with a friend over whether or not l33t
stuff would count in scrabble..then i reminded him that there
are no numbers in scrabble