bash.org archive

<murrrr> *bites tommah's hand off*
<murrrr> it must be pretty hard to type with only one hand
<FraudulentTommah> I won't respond to that

<@Canis> i wanted to move my nintendo once but didnt want to
lose my game
<@Canis> so i wired on a second power cord
<@Canis> and then walked it from outlet to outlet
<@Canis> im really lucky i didnt hit two circuits out of phase
<@Canis> that would have SUCKED

<Naivete> hey joe, if you suck at UO pvp, SAY ABSOLUTELY
NOTHING.
<Kiler> rofl
*** Joe_ is now known as Imkillingyou
*** Imkillingyou is now known as nexttimeiseeyou

<fiXie> me have black eye :(
<ArioZ`> from whats?
<heartz> hah, inept cocksucking of course

úúú KoRn^Chik/#xnet is just sad
(houlie) why are you sad Korn
(houlie) its not harvest season yet

<+Skerper> I remember once in first year CS
<+Skerper> this guy asked me to tutor him
<+Skerper> was absolutely devastated that he'd gotten a 0 for
his programming assignment
<+Skerper> so he shows it to me
<+Skerper> and he's literally written an essay on how to make
the program
<nugyflex> what the fuck
<+Skerper> complete with stock images and references
<BlackMoon> hahah
<+Jattenalle> haha, aaw
<+Skerper> but no actual program
<nugyflex> ahahha
<+Jattenalle> poor innocent little child
<+Skerper> Never had such an "oh sweety" moment in my life
<nugyflex> how does that happen
<+Skerper> I have no fucking idea, it was the most awkward
thing
<nugyflex> how can that possibly happen...
<+Skerper> I don't know how he got it into his head that that
was the assignment
<+Skerper> considering it had to be handed up to an automarker
<+Skerper> that compiles it and tests output
<nugyflex> Oooo nooo
<nugyflex> tries to compile essay
<nugyflex> rip

<+{R3D}Hurricane> im watching the backstreet boys on
SNL....and i finally realize why foreign countries hate the
U.S. so much

<|TripleH|> church
<|TripleH|> ya know
<|TripleH|> that place with the giant T on the roof

<treph> I have my computer
<treph> and
<treph> no job.
<treph> > i
<treph> You are carrying:
<treph> a computer
<treph> no job

<Tigwa> how funny would it be if you got held-up by a tshirt
ninja
<Tigwa> 'can you describe the man?' 'errr....well he looked
like he had a ninja hood made from a tshirt, was very pale and
thin, and kept yelling i will haxx0r j00'

*jwzrd-* kicks Butters in the nuts
*Butters* watches as jwzrd- breaks his foot on his morning
wood

<+NaruNaru> i have yet to find a girl with the correct
md5checksum

<McMoo> My computer's maximum uptime: 4w 2d 15h 39m 3s, set on
Tue, Feb 19 2002 at 5:53:00p
<McMoo> LOOK AT HOW BIG MY DICK IS
<McMoo> 4 WEEKS BIG!!!!!!!

*** ClayStudy is now known as Claymen
<Dingbat> ClayStudy means Clay is dong study.... so does
Claymen mean Clay is doing men? :P
<Claymen> stfu Dingbat

<Jv8> programming has destroyed my ability to speak English

<Guest34423> is Microsoft Access available in windows?
<Pinchiukas> no, it's for linux

(FakeBoobies): any one wanna to chat to a guy pretending to be
a chick with a pic of some model off the internet, msg me

<Seros_work`> :|  <--- this is my interested face
<Ithaqua> 8=====D  <--- This is my penis. Suck it.
<deVoca_work> life-size

<gloone> thinking that noone is here since it's saturday
<gloone> so that i can kill him with a screwdriver.
<gloone> or a stapler
<gloone> that's what i have here.

<Shelstra> :((
<Shelstra> my poor fishie
<|KazzA|> :o what happened
<Shelstra> nothing but...
<Shelstra> one of his eyes is black
<Shelstra> i think he might be blind :(
<|KazzA|> aww
<Shelstra> we only just noticed it
<Mousey> like it cares anyway
<Mousey> theres not much to see
<staticx> every three seconds it will say 'holyfuck, i can
only see out of one eye...'

<Starscream> okay, you guys suck and blow simultaneously,
making you all
excellent trumpet players.

<Min1ster> I have been captured My Regime has fallen and my
sons are dead. But I have some good news..... I just saved
hundreds on my car insurance by switching to Geico

*** ROFOL is now known as AOLROCKS
<AOLROCKS> What a surprise
<AOLROCKS> Not taken

<Sys> I hate maths.  What do you reckon they'll do if I fail
it?
<0ut_Lore> you repeat it.  fail it AGAIN, and you face the
exclusion board.  guess what they do?  ;P
<Sys> Exclude you from having to do it a third time? :D

*** hypr changes topic to '.'
<LkChaCha1> Ahh. . .hypr had his period. Must be that time of
month.

dragon9995: oh man
dragon9995: you know last night when I told you that I was
going to rape your mom or something like that?  apparently I
left it on the screen and my mom saw it and didn't think it
was a joke
dragon9995: she just came in here and freaked out out at me
dragon9995: holy shit
dragon9995: she like started crying and she thinks I'm a
rapist

<kmad> if your parents named you 'Penis' would you kill
yourself
<Bertovo> No
<Bertovo> I would kill my parents
<kmad> good point
<Bertovo> "Penis, quit jumping on the table"
<kmad> "penis, clean up after yourself"
<Bertovo> if only it were that easy

(jbk) I think i'm going to get some alcohol this weekend
seeing as i'm done with building robots
(jbk) and that calls for a celebration :)
(_none) jbk: youre probably the only person that has ever said
that sentence

<Cennt-> "how did your grandma die"
<Cennt-> "she saw me masturbating"

*** Starlet is now known as StarBBS
<Jerub> BBS?
<Jerub> as in dialup?
<Jerub> whats the number?
<Jerub> is it subscription?
<Jerub> got a large file section?
<Jerub> is it on fidonet?
<StarBBS> bbs as in be back soon

<Soopa> everyone hurry up and get banned so we can troll some
other channel

* Fred ([email protected]) Quit (Warning: Mirc, has caused
an illegal operation and will shut down. This happened because
you were about to Finish a download you were waiting on for a
month, and we can't have that.)

<bubbleboo> i think 0's and 1's in binary should be replaced
with 6's and 9's
<bubbleboo> would be much more entertaining

(Dark_Fear) women and malls gotogether like warez and t3
connectiosn :)

<@Cyb> wtf is it
< tom> like pictionary
< tom> it sounds gay but its actually really fun
< tom> until people start drawing pictures of kkk people with
NIGGERS DIE written on them
< tom> but that only happened this one time

<D1> dude, I'm so puerto rican.
<Guilty> I dont get it
<BR4D> youre so elton john
<Guilty> That I get

<MadClown> i have your soul
<fall0ut> no, some pine tree had my soul one night
<fall0ut> when I was drunk
<fall0ut> I chopped it down and dragged it through a field for
2 hours
<fall0ut> and got my soul back
<fall0ut> kthnx
<fall0ut> ^-- true story
<MadClown> for some strange reason, i beleive you
<eclypse> yea.. i can honestly say i dont doubt this
<fall0ut> nothing like an axe in one hand
<fall0ut> a beer in another
<fall0ut> screaming at the tree
<fall0ut> "FUCK YOU TREE, I'M GONNA GET M YSOUL BACK"
<fall0ut> then tying a logging chain to it and dragging it
around a field
<fall0ut> ....
<fall0ut> yea.....

<torm_> fuckin gay school tommorow
<Avram`> There is school for that?
<torm_> heh
<Al-Qadim> torm_'s about to graduate magna cum loudly with a
BS in catching
<Avram`> Does that allow you to get more gay sex or something?
<torm_> hah
<Al-Qadim> well once he has his degree he can go on to more
advanced classes like gerbiling and feltching
<torm_> aw come on now
<Avram`> I think you've cummed on enough.

[quit:#] moodlet (Connection reset by peer)
<moodlet> thou shalt not unplug the hub to plug in one's
hairdryer

<Snag> i saw this thing...... its like a rod with two lips you
put like a special rod-lube in it..
<Snag> supposed to be like a bj.... throat included
<XDDD> i prefer women for my bjs
<boozie> haha
<XDDD> but im kinda weird
<XDDD> i guess the pipe would be better, no body to get rid of
afterwards

<rewben> we are not perverts ;p
<akiron> speak for youself ;)

<ric> tbh, I would like to know why only fat women who have no
chance of scoring with anyone seem to see *me* as their ideal
partner
<tommy_> ditto
<ric> maybe, it's my good looks, my charm, my generosity....
<ric> or perhaps it's my hat of meat... just who knows?

[rancid_mf] wow i need to be a better typer i dont know what
is going on
(|Chris) typist*
[rancid_mf] ok im am idiot too

<Platterkat^> there's currently a hearing underway to find out
who knew what and when regarding kickbacks to Saddam's regime
from the australian wheat board
<Platterkat^> the deputy prime minister said yesterday I"
don't recall" 26 times
<Kadon> the australian wheat board.. why must they always try
to influence global politics
* Kadon tears up his fan club card

<eV`Zenoge> Isn't herpies food?
<eV`Zenoge> like chocolate
<eV`Zenoge> wait a minute
<eV`Zenoge> thats hershes

<Atomsk> I think my cousin just died trying to breakdance to
50 cent
<Atomsk> brb

*** devolve ([email protected]) has
joined
<devolve> what is the name of the sexual activity where you
put a tube up each others ass and pass shit between it
<aNuBiS-> devolve: Looking for something to do on a Saturday
night in New Zealand?

<isocat> onion headlines make me laugh out loud, even if i
have my cock in my hand

<slayer> Punctuation should be accompanied with correct
smelling and grammar.

<Zorglub> will php work on old browsers?

<rixon> I remember calling BBS's on my party line.
<rixon> my neighbors house burned down, and they couldnt call
the FD cause we were online.
<rixon> 3 ppl died.
<rixon> that sucked.

<ibrahim> is there alive experts?
<ozzmosis> I've been alive since I was born, you could say I'm
an expert at it

<Aiwa> I might be writing an editorial about the state of
NASCAR and what led to Dale Earnhardt's death...
<Graphic_V> I'm guessing the wall.

< Cillian> WTF is ubuntu christian edition!?!??
< Cillian> It's not like normal ubuntu is spawn of the devil
<@BlackRatchet> thou shalt not kill -9?

<Zer0_-X-> animeology - the study of japanese animation
<ecat> u must study it quite well
<Zer0_-X-> yah
<Zer0_-X-> i've got phd :D
<Goddess> permanent head damage?

BUMKEI: wanna go to the republican national convention
sKratch: pony it
BUMKEI: yea
BUMKEI: assassinate bush
sKratch: fbi gonna get you
BUMKEI: naw
BUMKEI: ill just hand him a bag of pretzels

<Realfloat> why does gcc makes exe files?
<Apollo-> *blink*
<Apollo-> maybe because it's a compiler?

<randomchimp> my god country song titles are getting worse by
the minute..a song called "Beer for my horses" is playing on
local radio
<Wer194> heh, probably get something like 'Her heart was gold
but her teeth were stained' next
<randomchimp> haha
<Wer194> or even 'dads indecision lead to my circumcision'
<randomchimp> LOL

<Bobby> "YOU ARE ONLY CONSIDERED A LOYAL TALIBAN MEMBER IF
YOUR BEARD IS AT LEAST ONE THIRD THE LENGTH OF AN X-BOX
CONTROLLER."

@<Yeshua> am I the only one who thinks the black-haired girl
in t.a.t.u is EXTREMELY hot?
@<Echo5ive> Yeshua: I second that erection.
@<Echo5ive> eh, I mean emotion.

<Posno> ne 1 h3r3
<Monk> is there a minimum level of l33tness needed to respond
to that?

<delysid-x> the only urine test they'll get out of me is a
TASTE TEST

<CrazyMAC> i wish i liked whiskey
<CrazyMAC> then i could drink it and stop shaving and look
tough

<ScumDog> the mom-look is sexy though
<ScumDog> don't take it wrong
<nitrifik> ScumDog: what weird fetish do you NOT possess dude?

* Nanobot primarily uses a pi-based counting system
<Nanobot> I know all of the digits in pi
<Nanobot> It's 10

<b1u3> good...admitting your stupidity is the first step to
disguising it as charming immaturity.

<PuBeNeMy-> bahaha
<PuBeNeMy-> jaymee just walked by the bird
<PuBeNeMy-> and it yelled
<PuBeNeMy-> SLUT
<cvc> although it does sound funny
<Matt^^^> PuBeNeMy-: have you been teaching the bird dirty
words?
<cvc> nah, he's been teaching the bird to be a judge of
character

<D1> why does cs give me that purple screen once I get out of
one game and start a new one?
<D1> WHY WHY WHY
* |Chris away ..(autoaway).. (On/l)(Off/p)
<D1> don't hide behind your petty autoaways

<tetsu2051> i wish i knew where my keyboard was..
<tetsu2051> oh ya...