bash.org archive

<clem> I know why I'm single
<clem> there's no 0xGF

<Pi|Mu|Rho> I'm sure that somewhere out there is the
right girl for you . Unfortunately, I think "out there" is
measured in
light years.

<sean> wow
<sean> that fart was gross
<sean> sounded like an elephant got shot

<TurboRout> i saw some of my high school friends when i got
put in rehab

<drdink> WaL-_-MarT: I used to know how to do an overhead page
in your store
<WaL-_-MarT> cool, drdink..
<drdink> actually what you do
<drdink> is you take walmart's employee phone off the pole
<drdink> and go get a portable phone from the electronics
department
<drdink> and plug it in to the pole
<drdink> and you can walk around the store
<drdink> and they can't catch you
<drdink> just don't leave, or its stealing

*** Malach has changed the topic on #nz to If your parents get
divorced, are they still cousins?
<lower> Shouldn't it be "If your parents get divorced, are you
still your own cousin?"
<Malach> lower - you inbreed your way, I'll inbreed mine.

<joshieboi> - i thought speed racer was the car

<dweez> f33dback, opinions are like assholes
<f33dback> so if you don't have one you're full of shit?

<ErrectoR> hey anyone know where I can download all the old
simpsons episodes?
<mavhc> ftp.amazon.com
<phanty> ftp.fox.com is faster
<ErrectoR> I don't think those two ftp's are working..
<ErrectoR> what's the l/p?
<QueenB> moron/total
<ErrectoR> nope..still not working queenb
<ErrectoR> you fucking assholes..
* ErrectoR has left #futuramavcd

<duckroll> they need a FF with a female lead that hates all
men, and masturbates
<jijiripdoze> female masturbation = hating all men?
<jijiripdoze> ok
<duckroll> YES
<duckroll> its a physical PROTEST AGAINST SEX
<CommanderStab> I don't think the words "physical protest
against sex" exist in Japan

<+brx|> u know whats great about spreadsheets..?
<+brx|> ....NOTHING THEY ARE FUCKING COCKBAGS

<spyderballa> you know back in my day white powder in
envelopes was a good thing

<\broken> eye kant teyep
<JackArse> sure you can
<JackArse> you just can't spell

<Xenophon> I was talking to this really cute girl, when I was
on a walk with my parents. I hadn't seen her in years. After
exchanging university experiences, I asked for her ph # and my
dad jumped out of the woodwork and said "I'll memorize half of
it for ya!"

<Punk-In-Drublic> THE FOLLOWING PEOPLE SUCK COCK ...Mousey,
Dave, Vas, Belindah..........YALL CAN GAT FUCKED COS IM DRUNK
WOOOOOOOOO ......BOOBIES WOOOOOOOOOO'
<Mousey> why am i first
<Mousey> thats really insulting
<vas-deferens> because your the best at iut
<mk4> why am i second ?
<vas-deferens> shit im third
<vas-deferens> i better work on my technique
<vas-deferens> at least im beating a chick
<Mousey> hahahah

<afk> thats why people who "try" to commit suicide dont really
want to die
<SLoW> did you know, on average, men are more likely to
succeed then women?
<SLoW> and that a man's weapon of choice is a gun, and a
woman's is pills
<Candy^^> men never care about making a mess
<Candy^^> ;p

<Melkor> ===== Question 9518/10000  =====
<Melkor> the chinese ideograph with two women under one roof
means what?
<Melkor> Hint: @@@@@@@
<Xylus2> incest
<UltraSSJ> free porn
<Xylus2> lesbian

*** Quits: MediArc (i am the lover in your bed)
<roded> i'm going to bed

<AkumaUsagi> I want to be able to trust people more.  That
means I have to be able to throw them further.

<@Ocean-Saurian> But you know... I realized somthing last
night
<@Ocean-Saurian> I realized you could buy trophies, and all
these years I have been trying to do sports

<JibberJim> what should happen to your webpages if you drop
dead?
<Jumper> is this a trick question ?

<opivy-z28> I'm being totally serious... do any of you ever
see like a 9-12 yr old girl and think she has nice legs
<opivy-z28> i do...and i wonder if thats normal

« INH- » hey!
« INH- » you know what i hate?
« INH- » when people pussy out of arguments by using "its my
opinion"
« INH- » if its your opinion, shut the fuck up and keep it to
yourself, bitch!
« INH- » ...
« INH- » ritalin soon.

<`RaSh> how do i install linux i got the cd and i dont see the
setup.exe or install.exe

<swl> I got a tshirt for my birthday that says "This ain't a
beer belly, it's a fuel tank for a sex machine"
<swl> i wonder if it was a nice gesture or not :P

<rakpointzero> ashton kutcher as batman?
<nimereht> Dude, where's my batmobile?

<perdida> should I go make porn for loan-payment cash? if so
which aspect of porn would have the best pay/disgusting stuff
ratio?

<memo> rgiorew09u34290
<Squizzle> Memo speaks ancient Decepticon!

<zlut> how to make a directory?
<Apollo-> mkdir
<zlut> thanks
<Apollo-> no problem, slut
<Apollo-> err, zlut

<timovgod> why is it that not 10 minutes after they put the
straight-jacket on my nuts start to itch?

<Emerald> <green>Is IRC html?</green>

<BDSChaos> i am hot
<BDSChaos> if I was male I would so be gay with myself
<BDSChaos> wait

<DrShah> anyone know what them things are called that will let
me fit a hd into a 5 1/2 inch bay?
<_8ight> yeah. screws.

<Actaeon> Stupid three-dimensional universe.
<Violetnite> Better than a two dimensional universe.
<Actaeon> Well, depends on the dimensions.
<Actaeon> And really, it is a good/bad thing.
<Violetnite> What is the good and bad.
<Violetnite> Just curious.
<Actaeon> The three-dimensionality makes it so that I am
seperated from people I meet on here by actualy traversable
space. On the other hand, three dimensions are necessary for
tits. So, guess I just have to deal.

<clay> math is for kids who cant get by on looks and trench
coats alone

<AtrocityX> is there a virus that can make your computer lag?
heh
<DeskLazer> it's called AOL

<DB7> Meat_30: Sex change?
<Meat_30> yep
<DB7> Works for me
<DB7> Any hole's a goat
<DB7> errr
<DB7> goal*

<TheRedBaron> 8.5 million... from what hat did they pull that
number out of?
<spldart> sniff sniff
<spldart> I don't think that's a hat

<AlieN__> hello...
<AlieN__> I'm damn bored
<AlieN__> be funny
<AlieN__> please
<Gato> *FART*
<AlieN__> yay canadian jokes

*** Now talking in #cars
*** Topic is 'No gay sex talk please thanks'
<spazzer> no gay sex talk eh?
<spazzer> this channel is going to be quiet then

<RevengePimpy> i found a lifestyles condom in my car
<RevengePimpy> in the back seat
<RevengePimpy> I can't reamber the last time someone rode in
the back seat
<RevengePimpy> maybe someone broke into my car to fuck or
something
<RevengePimpy> it boggles my mind

<Dreadnaut> i used to write poems about suicide and shit
<KrON> i did poems about cheese and stuff

<Kevyn> Ugh. I just had to explain to Jessica what fap meant.
Thanks guys.

<RamsusXIII> lol foodus
<RamsusXIII> err
<RamsusXIII> doofus

<Nikari[away]> OMG I GOT NEW SHOES
<Nikari[away]> YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS
<Nikari[away]> TIME FOR DDR

<jodaro> hmm, my mom just invited me over for dinner
<jodaro> mm, free food
<stu> you mean your mum doesn't charge for dinner?
<jodaro> no
<stu> damn

(neruaL) my mom's computer
(neruaL) just said "hey baby, you've got mail" in some
seductive male voice

<jamesm> is it worth going to see Moulin Rouge?
<Tippytoes> dont be a fag
<MMouse> i saw it twice. it was excellent
<Tippytoes> i rest my case.

<ckx> xmas was fun back before i was blessed with pubes and
still had hopes and dreams and such

*** Quits: amyafk ([email protected]) (Exit:
Faith is the bird that feels the light and sings when the dawn
isstill dark!)
<jm> Karma is the bird that shits on your car after you wash
it from doing donuts on the local church's front lawn

<Wooben> someone find me archie hentai

[OutLore  ] OMFG
[Lord-Data] OutLore: OYFG!

spaceinvader455: heh
spaceinvader455: I saw lake house yesterday
spaceinvader455: and when they first started trading letters
spaceinvader455: (the guy that lives in '04 and the girl that
lives in '06)
spaceinvader455: I thought to myself, "Ok, first letter, So,
how was star wars episode III?"

<EvilDygel> There's not much else I want to do with this until
Adam rebuilds the Domino server.
<Foobar> did he knock it over?

* Squizzle is now known as Love
* Scourge punches Love in the face.
* Love avoids Scourge forever.
<Love> (This is called an "allegory".)
<Love> (Which derives from the Greek for "Scourge will never
have a date in his life".)

<g9icy> heh, opposite my old house there was this massive
field...i used to find all sorts on there, old needles (didn't
touch), used jonnies...cars...bikes...etc
<Xanothis> are you implying you touched the used jonnies?

<Hellace> \\192.168.28.98\movies2\video clips\kitty stir
fry.mpeg
<Hellace> thats fucken wrong
<Gothmog> im not touching anything with a filename like that
<Gothmog> work on your subtlety Hellace...
<Gothmog> call it "dinner.mpeg" or something
<Hellace> well its dodgy hey
<Hellace> its a cat getting cooked..
<Gothmog> yeah i figured that
<Gothmog> stirfried infact...
<Hellace> quote by levi "its fucken wrong"
<Zen> aarg
<Zen> that fucking horrible
<Gothmog> you watched it?
<Gothmog> LOL
<Gothmog> come on, something called that... you expected it to
not be fucking horrible?
<Zen> well curiosity killed the cat

<thirdrai|> me n my friends had an intelligent conversation
the other day
<thirdrai|> we wre like
<thirdrai|> if u had to give head to ur father to save him
would u?

<+Cypherus> what is a splash-screen?
<Nagaika> when your screen falls into the bathtub

<{o_o}> occupation isn't liberation, killing & mainimg
children isn't liberation, you guys need a reality check
* {o_o} has quit IRC (Killed ((politically hostile. situation
diplomaticaly resolved under IRC Security Council Resolution
1422)))

* unchellmatt does the RAID lovers cheer... "ARRAY! ARRAY!"

<ecco> when I die I want to be buried in a wetsuit
<ecco> with a snorkel and mask and stuff
<ecco> I just think it'd be funny
<ecco> nobody would know how to react

<TheHood> yea, 2nd best team in baseball what motha fukaz
<TheHood> ws champs what motha fuckaz
<TheHood> yea
<TheHood> yea
<TheHood> wha
*** TheHood has left #baseball
* Legalize- takes off his bulletproof vest
<Legalize-> i feel so much safer now.
<Legalize-> damn irc.

<Berzerker> hey
<Berzerker> you hear about the new game they play at the white
house?
<Berzerker> swallow the leader.

<C-Rock> man id give a blowjob to be on Pen's quotes page.
<C-Rock> i might even swallow.

<axial> Which are the best PDAs these days?
<Chibby> when girls are kissing guys in the stairwell at
school
<Chibby> i think
<Chibby> i have no clue
<Chibby> why do you ask something like that?
<Quinn> That was a really bad one.
<Chibby> well whats a good PDA then?
<axial> ..huh?
<Chibby> you said: "what's the best public display of
affection?"
<Chibby> i attempted to answer it
<Quinn> I think ax was meaning personal digital assistant.
<Chibby> OMFG
: Chibby slaps myself
<Chibby> k bye~
<Quinn> I thought you were joking, heh.
<Chibby> persocon is the best PDA then

Hyp3rHax0r: they say office romances never work out
Hyp3rHax0r: they're probably right
Hyp3rHax0r: what kind of weirdo falls in love with an office?

<Saddam_Hussein> This room is being too fucking hateful.

<mhardyx> temporarily
<mhardyx> left one is either going to be shortened or removed
<mhardyx> and the right one is coming off so they can take the
screw out
<[Bardell]> IS HE TALKING ABOUT HIS BALLS!?!?!