bash.org archive

<[ _Bender_ ]> Guys, I've a copy of Norton AntiVirus 2002...
Can I still install that this year?

redpoint13: brb
MoRgAn4978: k
redpoint13: back
MoRgAn4978: that was fast
redpoint13: yea i pee in a bucket near my desk

<CM^> Im just two letters and an arrow to you, arent I?

<homerj> I'm starting to have a real dislike of vegitarians
<homerj> and their holier then thou attitude
<noxnbox> we should eat them
<ryo-ohki> I bet they'd taste good.
<berzerker> my band has a 6 minute track about hating
vegitarians
<ryo-ohki> Their body is like all meat, with just a little bit
of fat.
<berzerker> and throwing steaks at their face
<homerj> because they must have some sort of rule that they
tell you they are vegetarian like 5 times a day
<homerj> must be in the handbook "when you hvae the desire to
eat meat, tell someone your a vegetarian"
<DigDug> you know, vegetarians are probably kosher too

* Dr_Dos|KLONE has joined #zeuxworld
<Revvy> OH NOS
<Dr_Dos|KLONE> How do I kill on esper?
<EvilMario> ghost?
<Revvy> msg nickserv kill
<Dr_Dos|KLONE> I guess.
<Zenholder> /quit <nick> <password>
<Dr_Dos|KLONE> ok
* Dr_Dos has quit IRC (Ping timeout)
* Dr_Dos|KLONE has quit IRC (Quit: Dr_Dos censored)
<EvilMario> Hahah.
<Zenholder> :D
<EvilMario> You're the best, sir.
* Dr_Dos has joined #zeuxworld
<Zenholder> :P
<Zenholder> Did it work?
<Dr_Dos> heh
<Dr_Dos> Yes
<Zenholder> Good
* Dr_Dos has quit IRC (Killed (NickServ (GHOST command used by
EvilMario)))
<Zenholder> :D
<EvilMario> Excellent.
* Dr_Dos has joined #zeuxworld
<Dr_Dos> That's not right...
<EvilMario> You fool.
<EvilMario> Mwahah.. I mean.. HIIII

<opie-x> white people surf the net .. black people cruise the
net

[skorpion] gravity is a resource hog.

<scout> woohoo! the FORTRAN code works!
* gus blinks
<gus> dude, is it 1977 again and nobody told me ?
<heliOx> lol

<zeepe> swede girls are legendary
<Janus120> can i have one?
<zeepe> well
<zeepe> you have to be young and pretty with a big cock
<Janus120> im 5 inches myself, but im a very good listener

<rutabaga> I remember one tiem I was trickortreating and this
guy ansered the door in assless chaps and a cowboy hat
<rutabaga> that was the scaeryist haloween evar

<GreenO> I made a stop-go lego-porn animation
<GreenO> It was sweet... it was inside a castle.  It involved
a horse too

Lara: I wonder if something scary will happen if I rotate my
Everglide 180 degrees
*** Joins: Twitch ([email protected])
Lara: |\O_o/|
* Lara rotates it back

* Hawx grins and wonders if Steve Jobs has ever been called
Mac Daddy :D

<Alty> i say burn bill gates at the stake and all will be well
<Ron[afk]> :)
<Esper> yay! fire solves everything!
<Ron[afk]> Except for fires.

<Marasmus> So I was listening to a comedian who was talking
about the Queen of England being attractive when she was
young.
<Shae> Erm.. okay...
<Marasmus> And that some guys would talk about her, you know,
the lewd way guys do about celebrities.
<Marasmus> And some of the guys would go further than that...
and I thought, it must be very strange...
<Marasmus> masturbating to pocket change.

<iggz[work]> Indeed.
<iggz[work]> mav you might like this
<iggz[work]> http://sexyclube.uol.com.br/premium/galeria/
edicao260/modelo01_foto01.jpg?modelo01_foto22.jpg
<iggz[work]> http://asia.cnn.com/2002/TECH/science/09/20/
offbeat.sharks.virginbirth.reut/
<iggz[work]> no
<iggz[work]> fuck
<iggz[work]> not that
<iggz[work]> the second one
<iggz[work]> anyone who says anything dies

<taz> 0x0020   5018 2238 83c7 0000 4745 5420 6874 7470       
P."8....GET.http
<taz> 0x0030   3a2f 2f77 7777 2e69 6b65 612e 636f 2e75       
://www.ikea.co.u
<taz> 0x0040   6b2f 7072 6f64 7563 745f 7072 6573 656e       
k/product_presen
<taz> 0x0050   7461                                          
ta
<taz> muha
* taz snooping mothers network traffic

<Nick> how come everytime I see the phrase "Future-Proof" I
read it as "yesterday's obsolescent"
<Lanei> because you posess sufficient quantities of the
cynicism necessary for survival
<Force10> Man, if cynicism is all you need to survive, I'm
gonna live to be 150.

<SpookyD> if ppl saw what was on my screen right now they
would be shocked and disgusted ;)
<DanJ> SpookyD: So get some tissues and clean it

<FM> SMASHING TEH COCK
<andy> That sounds like you've got a hammer, and erection, a
temper, and a lot of pent up frustration.

<TF-Carbon16> Okies... heres how it works...
<TF-Carbon16> when i first encountered halflife, the
deathmatch mod... like hl multiplayer
<TF-Carbon16> i loved it and...
<TF-Carbon16> one day, i was sitting in science class high as
a kite
<TF-Carbon16> and, the teacher, was talking about the element
carbon, and mentioned that the isatope carbon16 is rare,
unstable, and random
<TF-Carbon16> then said sumthin about its halflife
<TF-Carbon16> and i was like half life, rare and unstable...
sounds like me
<TFr-c0k3> thats a lot of shit for a name man
<TFr-c0k3> i got mine from looking at a coke can on my desk ;)

<Art`> I don't want to work with people, I'm not a big people
person
<Saccy> I thought you wanted to be a surgeon?
<Art`> Well they're under general anaesthetic, I don't have to
talk to them.

<Diamond> I just got done watching porn.
<Diamond> Which has great music.
<Leper_Mess> ..you watch porn for the music?

insectouch: oh, i hought the whole cancer thing was just
something you made up so you didnt have to go out with me
tonight

<ColeW> heh, i just had to tackle my brother
<ColeW> he tried to look at my internet history =(
<obithrawn> How old is he?
<ColeW> ummm....13..14...
<ColeW> one of those
<obithrawn> Oh, good move then.
<ColeW> i was like, why is he racing towards the
computer....OH SHIT!
<Yawgatog> I think it's time you and he had a chat about the
Bird Maidens and the Killer Bees
<ColeW> no one will ever know about my hairy underaged russian
transexual fetish
<ColeW> ...
<ColeW> did i just say that out loud?
<CrazyLich> no you typed it
<ColeW> oh...phew
* CrazyLich copy + pastes quote.

<Doomaholic> my pad fell off, and i can play in an octave
thats not supposted to exist

<kurtis> I love electronics, always have been a tinkerer of
such things
<kurtis> it all started when I was 7, and wired a train set
directly to a wal socket...and shot the train through my
bedroom wall
<kurtis> suddenly I understood the difference from AC to DC
heh

<jason> life is like a rental car, you fuck it up, and give it
back.

<JDigital> Kazz, I think they're pretty obvious going on your
reputed dicksize.
<JDigital> Kazz has a 183948192 inch dick.
<dregan> Kazz - envy of every man, dog and skyscraper
architect on the hemisphere.

<PickleC> I want to read
<PickleC> but I have this disease
<PickleC> called
<PickleC> L-A-Z-Y
<Carly> so you just guess whats on the screen then?

<dreawn> I found out earlier today from an ex-AF friend of
mine that a gallon
of prize winning bull semen sells for 10 L
<dreawn> err 10 K
<dreawn> so I've taken up a new occupation and double life as
a semen rustler.
<Marmalade420> so i need is polar bear semen
<Marmalade420> and i can get money
<Marmalade420> all
<dreawn> well, prize-winning bull semen.
<dreawn> you could join my gang of ruthless thugs who steal
semen from large
creatures and try to sell it
<Marmalade420> sure
<dreawn> nothing like fleeing the farm of a north dakota
farmer with a gang of
lawmen chasing you in pickup trucks worrying about
spilling some
bull gravy out of a tin pail
<dreawn> nope, nothing at all.

<rancid_beaver> im sick and tired of this relationshit
<rancid_beaver> relationship*
<rancid_beaver> how the fuck did i mispell that?

Bezoar    of all the liver disorders one could get, hep A is
pretty good. you get it, you feel like shit for a little
while, it goes away, and you're immune for life.
eval      sounds like religion

* kanis lost something for mouthing off to an admin
<Cybsled> I hope it wasn't virginity
<kanis> fuck you

<iban> uhoh
<iban> its 5am
<iban> about time for my morning wood

<HardlyJW> anyone know how to change an ip?
<lysip> yes
<lysip> clone your mac
<HardlyJW> ?
<HardlyJW> i have windows...

<|Chris> fat chicks are like mopeds
<|Chris> fun to ride, but don't let your friends see you on
one
<DigDug> heh
<DigDug> she's like a scooter though
<var> understand 1 thing tho: fat chicks are so grateful to
get laid that they will do your laundry fuck you suck you cook
you dinner and 13reakfast and not har13or ill will when u want
to leave and go smoke dope w/ your friends.
<DigDug> ya
<DigDug> but they're fat
<|Chris> hahahah
<|Chris> yeah..there's the whole not being physically
attracted to them problem

The-ill-man- *beat kicks in*  yo yo  you know i be somkein
some grass, tappin some ass, while rippin on bowls, and hittin
on hoes
-cyanide- ur smoking weed while fucking girls while smoking
weed while trying to pick up girls.. nice rap..

<Mr_Nutty> once in a west texas town of el paso
<Mr_Nutty> I fell in love with a mexican girl
<Fina> It didn't stop her from charging you, though

<nafetsta> i am confused
<nafetsta> i am like downloading pr0n - with like 500 kb/s
<nafetsta> so i was wondering if i should knock on my
neighbours door and go like "thanks for sharing dude"

[aq] i love irc quotes
[ob0t] i hate them
[ob0t] i always end up looking like a retard

<rlorenzon> ...and that's when i knew she was the one
<wolfnip> how did you know that?
<rlorenzon> because...i lost all my friends.

<PrincessLeia2> i woke up this morning all dressed, and in bed
with my keyboard

* go_boy getting his haujobb on
<jej> i read that as 'handjob'
<go_boy> i assumed you would
<jej> you can always count on me.
<go_boy> for a handjob?
<jej> of course.
<go_boy> rockin.

<atomicbanana> Realtor came today.
<martha> did you get any on you?
<atomicbanana> no. I had a cumbrella

<Tomalak> Pregnancy from rape is extremely rare.
<DarkYouth> But here you are, eh Tomalak?
<Tomalak> I wouldn't say what your dad did to your mom was
strictly consensual, DY. If a sheep runs away, it doesn't mean
"keep on going".

<antiuser> man
<antiuser> flash is like sméagol
<antiuser> the first time you get a bit worried
<antiuser> the second time it's all nice
<antiuser> then the third time it wants to KILL MASTER

<Forcepath> i need advice!
<Forcepath> on second thought: asking for advice in IRC is one
of the classic movie blunders...

<scummo> I was saying "eat a dick" even then, trying to get
good grades by drawing pictures of shoes
<scummo> a tradition I keep up even today
<scummo> the 4.0 on the 15-page paper about the importance of
midgets and dwarfs in film has to be my crown jewel

<sup3rh3r0> kali: give me your user name and password and I'll
test it
<kali> yes, that's what it is!
<kali> supadupakali, surge
<sup3rh3r0> (email address censored)
<tima> heh
<sadielady> haha
<WhtCastle> heh
<p3t3_> hehe
<zombidwee> hahahaha
<zombidwee> mwahahhahah
<tima> smrt
<Valandra> whoops
<kali> uh, that's probably bad to say since surge is like my
password for everything, huh
<WhtCastle> LOL
<Tony> hah
<p3t3_> HAHAH

<@harb> Andy: 01:16 < Danelope> http://www.newgrounds.com/
portal/view.php?id=30319
<@kitten> JESUS FUCK
<@kitten> THERE ARE NOW SEVEN FUCKING POPUP WINDOWS
<@harb> Oh yeah.
<@harb> Andy uses IE.
<@harb> Sorry about that.
< Danelope> Hahaha.
< Danelope> IE is for cocksksksk.
<@harb> <cypher> I don't even see the popups anymore.
<@harb> <cypher> Just blonde. Brunette. Redhead.
< Danelope> <cypher> Just viagra, penis enlargement, 581% more
cum.

<user> uhhh.
<IJ> Hi.
<user> hi. I'm still having problems with the akick.
<IJ> On which channel?
<user> I was opped, then I got disconnected, and now my ghost
just permbanned me.

*** tate|work is now known as tate
<chaoticset_Perling> Hey tate
<tate> yo, chaotic
<tate> I just did two of the dumbest things possible
<chaoticset_Perling> ...first?
<tate> the first was staying up all night as part of a plan to
attempt to reset my internal clock
<chaoticset_Perling> ...and the second?
<tate> the second was laying down in bed two hours before work
thinking I could catch just one hour of sleep
<chaoticset_Perling> LOL!

<_bryan_> its a good thing MS isn't in the condom business

<Shark463> hey, did u see stevie wonders new album?
<Chaz> No
<Shark463> neither has he.

<Razor_EQ> god damn I just embarresed myself with a girtl I
lik
<Razor_EQ> like
<Razor_EQ> look at this shit
<Razor_EQ> rangers4life03: im glad i didnt ask for one now
<Razor_EQ> dazed_n_confused_1983: i have cokes and dr peppers
tea
<Razor_EQ> rangers4life03: cool dr pepper
<Razor_EQ> rangers4life03: but I dont drink cocks anymore

<@Blaxthos> five, i know of no police department that has a
year long academy
<@Blaxthos> i call bullshit
<dk|laptop> obviously you haven't watched police academy

<handwash> <Darkroot> Pigsbig78: omg, you bitch! mv
possessions outside; chown %n car; chmod 600 car; echo 'int
main(void) { printf("x25sn", "haha, you bitch!!n"); }' >
meep.c; gcc meep.c -o meep; ./meep
<handwash> guy
<handwash> translate?
<gunkaaa> handwash: it's complicated
<gunkaaa> handwash: he moves his stuff outside, changes the
ownership of his car to himself and sets it so that only he
can read/write to it, writes a c program which echos "haha you
bitch" called meep, compiles it, runs it.
<handwash> er

<Vang> No matter how dead one is, it's still demoralizing to
see one's crotch get hurled explosively across a warehouse.

<hawker> just grab a gun then...
<hawker> end ur misery...
<TomServo> shooting my boss?
<TomServo> good idea

<malis> Also, minister seems to be the most efficient position
<rizen> minister?
<rizen> do you mean missionary?
<malis> whatever
<rizen> the minister position would be with the young boy on
his knees

<MeLearnin> Why does _Bunny always tell people he is going to
bed?
* MeLearnin brb taking a shit....

<sheik> your mom
<striderj> what
<sheik> yeah thats why i sucked your moms dick last night
<striderj> what, hahahahahahah
<sheik> wait no thats not what i meant
<striderj> sure

<intra> I want to propose to my wife with a giant foam #1
finger instead of a ring.

<SunTzuX> Ohio should be the middle of nowhere
<SunTzuX> should be called*
<[BSI]Psychlowne> don't you hate when you leave the most
important part of the sentence?

<i386> http://www.bash.org/?21858 <----- ROFL!
<illusi0n> haha
<i386> http://www.bash.org/?7755 <---- ABHHHAHHAH! :D SO SO
TRUE!
<i386> http://www.bash.org/?4395 <--- muahah, Linux Conf 2003
<i386> http://www.bash.org/?31318 <--- hehe, reminds me of
atomic
<BenZor> ^^____ HAHA SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU LAME FUCKING
BASH.ORG LINKING N00b, WE'RE ALL FUCKING ADDICTED AND HAVE
SEEN IT BEFORE

<LL-> why did u msg me?
<marry> realy im searching to get married
<marry> can you help me
<LL-> why u wanna get married?
<marry> becuse i dont want to live in gaza

<Rayne> I need to talk to you about the amount of time your
spending "IRL"
<Rayne> how do you know you can trust these "IRL" friends
<Rayne> have you /ns infoed them?

<Anatole> That bot was from Russia.
<Anatole> And there's a e-mail address, as well!
<Rev> Russian...so it begins...
<Anatole> And a name.
<Anatole> Eeeeeeenteresting.
<DeadSnake> so, it seems we are having a new cold war now
<RAPEAPE> yeah
<DeadSnake> but it will not be fought on our lands, or our
seas, or in the air, but in our homes, on IRC
<RAPEAPE> SAQ vs SOVIETS
<Rev> They struck first, with porn-bots.  But will the
americans retaliate?
<DeadSnake> WE SHALL RETALIATE
<DeadSnake> but porn-bots we won't send, but email viruses!
<Rev> Mmm macros and attachments most vile.
<DeadSnake> we will contract the best hackers that china has
to offer, then we do a preemptive strike on russia with a low
level version of klez
<DeadSnake> then, when their defenses are down, we do a full
on retaliatory strike with a modified version of the "Love
Bug" virus
<Rev> Contact CNN, they'll have to get to work on their theme
music.