bash.org archive

<DF> Does anybody here live in a dorm ? That would be so cool
living right near your mates 24/7
<Cav> i boarded for year 12
<Cav> it was interesting but a pain in the arse
<Cav> err
<Cav> i better change that reply :)

<[sPaG]> I USED TO LISTEN TO NSYNC WHEN THEY WERE UNDERGROUND

<juice> i overheard one of the girls in my dorm saying they
wanted to win an orgasm competition
<spinks> who was that Laura?! Would I know them?!
<juice> they said they wanted to _win_ the competition spinks

<MegamanX2K>yeah, the best thing Saddam could do now would be
to go to the Un and hold a conference in which he tells then
plainly, "The only place you need to send weapons inspectors
to is...MY PANTS! Cuz baby I've got a big one stowed away
there, ready to launch! Ohhhhh yeah!"
<MegamanX2K>...it's not like he's actually respected to begin
with...

<@DocGonzo> saying mac osx has 'the power of unix' is like
putting whippets in your glovebox then saying your car has
'the power of nitrous'

<@Asha`monkey> Storm is like a 64 or something like that.
<+darkLem> boy, he looks younger than he is obviously.
<+nosphalot> he scarifices virgins to keep up appearance
<+darkLem> ...so THAT'S why he hangs around on IRC!

<MartinBlank> I knew a guy who dressed up for Halloween as a
giant penis with ferns growing around the base, and said he
was dressed as a dickweed.

<N1Hawk> hydro` is trying to find a good copy on kazza
<hydro`> yea
<hydro`> thats like finding a hooker who hasnt been fucked

<akh76> Hello, I'm "an ki hong" from Korea.
<akh76> I want to know The reason Why I'm ven
<akh76> I'm lacks a Knowledge of  irc
<akh76> Thank you and I hope to get your reply back soon.

<cloud1> if warez is too expensive for you, maybe the internet
isnt a wise investment for you either

<DrWoody> <intra> I want to propose to my wife with a giant
foam #1 finger instead of a ring.
<RastaSaf> of course the correct answer to that quote would
be: how long did it take the doctors to remove it from you?

<xa-mua> i think i'll go rent seabiscuit
<reboot> you leave my wife alone

<krypt> note to self: never tell a girl she's not tight
<Bigbacon> did you?
<krypt> yeah
<krypt> i told her best friend last night
<Bigbacon> what was her responce?
<krypt> her best friend was like
<krypt> 'she wanted you to think she was a virgin' and i was
like 'i never thought she was a virgin' 'she wasn't tight
enough'
<krypt> then i was like
<krypt> 'she has small boobs with big nipples too'
<krypt> and her friend was like
<krypt> I DON'T NEED TO KNOW THIS STUFF

<treaps> i've always wanted to try taking diezepam and trying
to do math or program computers
<rdgzt> What's diezepam?
<treaps> muscle relaxer/antianxiety drug
<treaps> it's a class IV drug on this chart
<rdgzt> It makes you shit your pants and not worry about it?

<Urashima> I wonder if it's morally defensible to kill my
neighbours for having a crappy taste in music and wanting to
share it with me early in the morning... -_-

<deltax> your not to smart
<SofaKing> too smart
<SofaKing> your not that bright yourself

<jorm> it will be my favorite thing until i remember that i
have a penis.

< Hippo> i'd be the worst jesus ever, i'd be constantly drunk
if i could turn water into wine

<andyroo> So, whats everyones new years resolution?
<AnimeMan> no more lacking sex
<AnimeMan> 2 times a day minimum
<AnimeMan> what about you andyroo?
<andyroo> With every passing moment, I want to type more
gramatically.
<andyroo> I'm just practicing at the moment.
<andyroo> I want to believe that I'm smart, while others think
I'm a d#8khead.
<andyroo> Hopefully, now and again an intelligent operator
will ban me for this
<AnimeMan> hahah
<AnimeMan> you forgot a period
<AnimeMan> hopefully god doesn't forget to give my gf one

<fff> back when my ancestors were apes, they were better than
your ancestor apes
<fff> my ape ancestors had richer culture than your ape
ancestors
<fff> although when our ancestors were amoeba, i'll concede
your amoeba ancestors were smarter than mine

<totalreality> Dail-up has its Pros
<syphonic> Like..?
<totalreality> like when your girlfriend finds out that you
slept with another girl so she trys to call your house to find
out whats going on or give you shit
<R^J> couldent she just knock on the front door?
<totalreality> Shit! Brb
* totalreality is away: locking the doors

Dr SpaZZo: Simpsons isnt that good anymore
TwilightKnight00: its still good!
Dr SpaZZo: Its just a little sucky, its still good, its still
good

<oR1on|Trivia> 6. What is a leech a type of?
<AuthSrev> woman

<ouija> He likes to hit on girls
<ouija> and then go like
<ouija> HAHA HA!!! I'm QUEER!

<spritegoddess> I had some kid call me up at work today
<spritegoddess> (I work at TRU)
<spritegoddess> asking me for help in Vice City
<spritegoddess> and he sounded like he was maybe...10
<spritegoddess> I don't know why he was calling the place
where he bought the game for in-game help
<Mank> Probably because his mom told him to, sprite.
<spritegoddess> "It's ok sweetie, ask the nice toys 'r us lady
about the prostitutes"

<Digital-^> i love brits , every time i hear someone mention a
fag break all i can think of is someone knocking on my door ,
picking me up , and smoking me

<Hawx> wtf is Scotty
<Shinji> Hawx - ScottyFox, he's in here occasionaly, I used to
live with him in Canada.
<Hawx> scottyfox is one letter away from being scattyfox
<Shinji> Hawx - and you're four letters away from being
'fuck'.
<Hawx> :D

(Deranged): Having my right hand as a girlfriend is the best
relationship I've ever had.
(Deranged): It's always up for threesomes, it'll never cheat
on me.
(Deranged): And best of all, I don't have to talk to it after
sex, because I don't know sign language.

<prepared>Theorem: All numbers are equal.
<prepared>Proof: Choose arbitrary a and b, and let t = a + b.
Then
<prepared>a + b = t
<prepared>(a + b)(a - b) = t(a - b)
<prepared>a^2 - b^2 = ta - tb
<prepared>a^2 - ta = b^2 - tb
<prepared>a^2 - ta + (t^2)/4 = b^2 - tb + (t^2)/4
<prepared>(a - t/2)^2 = (b - t/2)^2
<prepared>a - t/2 = b - t/2
<prepared>a = b
<prepared>So all numbers are the same, and math is pointless.

<JDigital> Sounds like a really, really kool hentai webcomic.
<Subvillain> Not a webcomic, a paper manga.
<JDigital> Manga + scanner = webcomic. DYS?

<Archeoptrix> Some girl I know is goign to open up an abortion
clinic called "Humpty Dumpty" when she grows up

<Yurijin> HOLY CRAP
<Yurijin> i was playing a song
<SoSul> hellos
<Yurijin> and forgot i left some porn video in the play list
<Yurijin> and all of a sudden
<Drayth> ROFL
<MonopolyMan> XD.
<Yurijin> "AHHHH <music ends>" "OHH OHH OH <slobber> OHHH"

<NW>: The NHL has the Stanley Cup, the MLB has the World
Series, and the NFL has the Super Bowl.
<NW> I'm not sure what the NBA has...
**Reno sips vodkety.
<[Drum]>: The Championship.
<Ran[afk]>: The Rape Accusation Trial.

<J.Rai> Mr Pibb. - He's like Dr. Pepper without the degree.

<GodsJiva> cloning should be allowed!
<f0dder> cloning is bad
<f0dder> cause there's too many errors
<GodsJiva> but... if they dont practise, there will always be
errors!
<f0dder> just stick to animals at least
<GodsJiva> yeah, to start with
<Koding_W> aye. stick to animals.
<Koding_W> thats my motto.

<Samrod> while ME, on the other hand, FOUND a digital Casio
watch, spend 2 days breaking the code to access the phonebook,
called a buncha peaple to see who they know in common, and
eventually found its rightfull owner, which turned out to be a
classmate
<fGewA> me find digital watch!
<fGewA> me call rightful owner!

<Dann> this is so sad...
<Dann> i want to find the "super mario bros movie" on
limewire, just for old times' sake... but guess what my first
search result is?
<Dann> the 40 year old virgin

<zig> i remember when i was on AOL and i thought the internet
was divided into sections like... GAMES MOVIES SPORTS NEWS

<Nall> I'm so confused everytime I come in here. Either stop
changing your names, or like, start cybering with me, so I
fucking remember you.

<ErikN|WORK> do you have sdl installed?
<savepotatoes> think so
<ErikN|WORK> hmmm
<savepotatoes> probably
<ErikN|WORK> are you sure?
<savepotatoes> yea
(time passes...)
<savepotatoes> whats sdl?

<Hawaiian_Pig> that reminds me... if i ever get the chance to
write something on a bomb, it'd have to be an ascii wang.

<Voyd> What about Battlefield1943? and 44?
<zen> 42 just came out, give them time to sequalize
<Toen> 1943 and 1944 were peaceful years, you see.
<Voyd> Oh.
<Toen> except for the war.
<Voyd> Darned lying histroy books.
<aen{afk> Ahaha
<aen{afk> "Life was peaceful and all, yep... 'cept for the war
part."
<Toen> well christ, if you're going to count a little massive
invasion of europe here and a little rampant genocide there...

<Xmit> And I wont be on irc ever again
<coaxial> Why not?!
<Xmit> Because it is a waste of time
<Xmit> I am declaring that I will never waste time like this
again
<coaxial> but we lub u
<Xmit> I hate you you stupid bitch

<Smmenen> Rakso, as a law student, how can it possibly help
you to be so exaggerating
<Tristal> Do you even know what lawyers DO?

<hye> sex caffeine and computing power
<tia> hehe
<hye> the trinity

<!5_DeR> you didnt just read what one guy on a forum said  and
accepted it as truth 
<NoDamage> yes i have 
<NoDamage> i find the internet to be pretty reliable

<Drew```> I really dont appriciate my sister saying "oh, close
your eyes andrew, I already took off my pants outside"

( Fuzzy     ) jBalls: go get all asian on them and start
bargining
( jBalls    ) haha i lack that crucial gene
( jBalls    ) i cant bargain my way out of a cardboard box
( Lev       ) but you ddr like a motherfucker

<cwd> if you use mirc in wine then i'm going to fucking kill
you

<q[torg]> joel is a cox high speed member.
<bliant> so he gets high speed cox?
<japov> nah it's my uncles high speed cox

<Gwuffy> yay getting new linkin park album
<CoRDS> are you about to break?
<Gwuffy> nope
<Gwuffy> but im one step closer
<CoRDS> thats way too much angst for one person
<devkev> he needs a little room to breathe

<Y> I dl'ed the Tatu video
<Fuzen> No one is going to remember them in a month, I
guarantee you.
<Y> that's because everyone who listens to them now except for
myself did so because they saw them make out in the video
first
<Fuzen> Correct.
<Fuzen> That's the entire reason that they're popular.
<Fuzen> They make out in their video.
<Fuzen> I would advise them to continue this trend, but
increase in gratuity each video. At that rate, they'll be
fucking donkeys by their next album.
<Y> next video, "All the things she said club remix"
<Y> they take their clothes off and snowball in the rain
<Y> they get hardcore gangbanged in the video after that
<Fuzen> Then it's on to bukkake.
<Y> it'll be snuff porn by track 10, and there goes their
careers
<Fuzen> I look forward to that day.

tobby14 ([email protected]) has joined #Lobby
<tobby14> whats up you all mudafuckers
<@Dante> i think you're on the wrong server
<@Dante> you want irc.whitetrash.wigger.net

<+sysys> i could tell you if WINDOWS FUCKING ME didn't crash
<+sysys> er
<+sysys> WINDOWS ME
<+sysys> that didnt come out right
<@spacemank> LOL

<MrPuppy> like 3 hours ago
<MrPuppy> i was wankin to porn and i just got up
<MrPuppy> my door was open and my parents have been walkin
around
<MrPuppy> they prolly saw me
<MrPuppy> i heard them laughing

* mike23 joined #mircscripts.org
<mike23> can anyone tell me a website for mircscripts and
addons ?

<su-Septik`wrk>  when the world trade center bombing occurred,
the reporters said they could not retrieve the black box. my
friend, who was stoned at the time, said "goddamn, ppl must be
desperate for a playstation 2"

(|Robot|Bender): Kronos, so angry. So mad. so full of hate.
Have a salad, a lite beer and take a nap.
(jot): salad, lite beer? you want to make him happy, not gay

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< Chage> revolving door.

* }Phoenix{ has joined #haxxors
<}Phoenix{> Hey, everybody type in /beep 31337 if you wanna be
super-leet
<@Tyreal> Dont do it
<jackle> /beep 31337
<redwing> /beep 31337
<GangstaUO> /beep 31337
<jackle> gah!!!

<Alex> Mosser!
<Alex> heh
<Alex> I've been there
<Alex> always the private bath though
<MrSmartass> Sounds like the Hotel Edison in NYC.
<grue> how did I read that as "pirate bath"?
<Alex> is there a fetish you're trying to repress?
<grue> Could be
<grue> I think the mental idea of Keira Knightley in a bathtub
is what did it
<grue> "Avast, lass! Prepare to be boarded!"

<Jumper> which one are you reading ?
<snot> security experts ( news.com.com )
<Jumper> ah, news.com that redirects to news.com.com for
unfatomable reasons
<Jumper> I guess they weren't commy enough
<Jumper> haw haw, get it ?? RED BASTARDS
<snot> they where news.com.com.com before the .com bust, guess
they just playing it safe
<Jumper> yeah, they must've hyped down now

<FlipTopBox> Concatenate?
<mightyflo> its something sexual
<FlipTopBox> Concatenate can be sexual, baby.
<mightyflo> its something sexual to someone who hasn't taken a
programming class

<Mithrandir> http://www.geekissues.org/quotes/?12572
- did you know that it is anatomically impossible to lick your
elbow...and 75% of the people who hear that actually try to
lick their elbow?
<SirPrux> already read that
<SirPrux> it's not funny
<Mithrandir> did you try?
<SirPrux> Yeah

<l0wkey> do any of you wonder why pubic hair doesnt get as
long as normal hair

<l0wkey> i am in a jam...it is my old roommates 21st birthday
tonight, no school tomorrow, a few movies i want to see,
Simpsons and X-Files...what to do?
<l0wkey> I KNOW...STAY ON IRC

<loko> im not speak spanish
<loko> I use a translator
<Kitsa> what language do you speak?
<loko> spanish

<flawed> if you go test drive a jaguar they should give you a
free neon
<flawed> as a gift

<PSX> my ex told me she was late one time.. i kept telling her
"yea, its going to be ok babe" but in my head i was saying
"FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCCCCCCCK FUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCK!@#%"
<Skier> heh
<robs> psx: been there done that
<`Nemesis> they call "I'm pregnant, call me!" and then you
fedex them a coathanger with a note that says "You know what
to do.". They generally don't call back after that