bash.org archive

<^bat-sai> sendai :p
<sendai> bob
<^bat-sai> hows lismore?
<sendai> ok
<sendai> not horrible
<sendai> :)
<sendai> leaving tomorow afternoon   :)
<^bat-sai> i once went to lismore
<^bat-sai> for a baseball competition
<^bat-sai> when i was 13
<sendai> what happened bob?
<^bat-sai> i was mocked
<^bat-sai> because i was the only one who thought we were
there to play baseball on the snes

<orange1> i think i got it figured out.
<orange1> instead of giving users a long explanation on why it
won't work when they uplaod a file named "what? me worry?.doc"
to their web space, we can just give them the message "this
file will not work. if you read the documentation, you would
know why"

<McFarlan> Those bastards did somthing terrible today
<McFarlan> They put a big picture of Goatse in the lunchroom
trash can at breakfast this morning
<McFarlan> People would come to dump thier trays...and stop
and look down in the trash
<McFarlan> It was really funny, but wrong at the same time :/
<Flex-Work> i would have thrown up
<Flex-Work> :P
<McFarlan> I thought a couple were
<McFarlan> Then the principal walks over
<McFarlan> Grabs the trashcan, and walks out of the cafeteria
<Moonsaber> Do you think they linked it to you? :-)
<McFarlan> I'm hoping not

<Gerudo> i just thought of something
<Gerudo> after eating some fun-size candy, i have a
question...
<Gerudo> whats so 'fun' about fun-size candy?
<Gerudo> i mean, if my dick was that small, it sure as hell
wouldnt be labeled 'fun-size' would it??

<Myles> if ur piss comes out like vanilla pudding wat duz that
mean

Dirt Devil351: i found this chic
Dirt Devil351: and she likes porn
Dirt Devil351: alot
ianepson: uh huh
Dirt Devil351: shes horny
Dirt Devil351: i tell ya
Dirt Devil351: dude
Dirt Devil351: she was lookin at a porn site
ianepson: did she ask ur credit card number and offer a three
day trial too?

<egypt> how do you spell it.. caffiene or caffeine?
<Nighthawk> Caffeine
<StarThorn> I spell it: L - I - F - E. ;-)
<Nighthawk> C8H10N4O2 :)

<KeeperX> "Your profession puts you in a position to be
interested in both technology and biosecurity issues so we ve
arranged with COMDEX to offer you a free All-Access Pass when
you register by midnight, EST, Friday, October 11. "
<KeeperX> wtf
<KeeperX> i write about video games
<KeeperX> how does that make me interested in biosecurity
issues?
<Legacy> You've played RE right?

<zipperface> Erin, mon cherrie, ta beauté et seulment
comparable à qui a coupé le fromage.
<Xanathis> did you say her beauty is comparable to a cup of
cheese?
<Jedah> no no
<Jedah> her beauty is only comparable to who cut the cheese

<coulson> Check this quote :) "<n|ghtOUT> my gf can smoke
cigarettes with her pussy"
<BiOHaZd> She must taste like an ashtray

* Shi-chan beats Tino down
<Shi-chan> DIE
<Tino> haha
* Shi-chan takes out a spoonn
<Shi-chan> DON'T MAKE ME USE THIS
<ilifin> there is no spoon

<SVJ-FuNiOnZ> man this sucks
<SVJ-FuNiOnZ> i got new deoderant and it smells like my
grandpas cologne
<SVJ-FuNiOnZ> so i cant jackoff without seeing a mental image
of my grandpa

<mewse> i bet she was really hot in preschool

<c0rnflake> what the fuck
<c0rnflake> lol
<c0rnflake> dude
<c0rnflake> whats that one site to get your own ip?
<c0rnflake> www.whatsmyip.com ?
<madlib> www.dunno.com
<travolta> c0rnflake: aol keyword: ip
<c0rnflake> Im not on aol
<c0rnflake> lol
<travolta> you sure?

<pdd> we like hydraulics because
<pdd> we like to pretend we're matadors riding a rampaging
bull
<pdd> even though matadors don't ride bulls
<pdd> i had to relate it somehow
<pdd> you understand
<pdd> SILENCIO

geoffduman: :: watches a movie with 2 word documents open,
mail running and 3 im conversations going with absolutely no
problems ::
e l i t e m r p: yeah well once i get my new pc ill watch 2
movies, with no word cause i dont have it, but instead ill
open PS and load high res porn for midget transformation, then
ill chat with hot 13 year olds via AIM AND ICQ... while
LAUGHING AT YOU

<Allison> what was that website
<Allison> with all the IRC quotes
<Allison> bang.org or somethin

<james>once when I was at work at a cafe a man came in and
ordered 3 'cappucini'
<morg>haha
<james>I asked him if he would like a biscotto to go with that

<StoneTear> damn i'm hot
<StoneTear> i smell like barbequed eliteness

*** Legalize- ([email protected]) has
joined channel #baseball
<Lumpy> what do you want to legalize?
<Lumpy> blunts?
<Legalize-> child labor and wastewater dumping
<Lumpy> hahahaha
<Lumpy> thats cool

<Spiral> sdfklsd;fjs;dlkfjlsd
<audiosonic> THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOUR KEYBOARD
<Spiral> Dude.
<audiosonic> that's better.

<fyre> better delete that file
<fyre> before you steal all my intellectual property!
<black-hand> haha
<fyre> if my intellectual property was a monopoly square
<fyre> i'd be one of the cheap purple ones

<poste> no, i know this chick with awesome big boobs...2
actually
<rox-work> 2 awesome big boobs?
<rox-work> i should hope so
<matthardy> like one boob on a chest, is like kinda funky and
wrong
<spazzer> nah, poste is confused
<spazzer> the chick has one huge uniboob
<matthardy> spazz: ahaha uniboob
<spazzer> and a unibrow to match

<Krypto-> while you sleep and wet your bed tonight.. i'll be
in the land of hobbits.. SO FUCK U
* Krypto- prances off

<Lilmuckers> i called my headmaster dad today =/
<ibor132> hahaha
<ibor132> howd u manage that?
<SonicRageX> heh
<Lilmuckers> he said something and i saidm "yes dad"
<Lilmuckers> in the lesson
<ibor132> rofl
<Lilmuckers> in front of the calss
<ibor132> whatd he do>?
<Lilmuckers> said "i doubt i was that promisuous 16 years ago"
<Lilmuckers> promiscuous
<ibor132> ROFL!!!!
<SonicRageX> dude
<SonicRageX> thats classic
<ibor132> someone bash that

<+Clive> news.bbc.co.uk headlines: Police are searching bins
in a bid to find fresh clues in their hunt for missing
schoolgirl Shannon Matthews.
<+Clive> So... they're looking for a laden bin?

<curse|sleeeep> i think i'm calling in to work tomorrow
<curse|sleeeep> i'm coughing up things that aren't even mine
<Zomb-mar> next time spit and dont swallow

<Javi> a gijoe game would suck
<Javi> cause nobody ever dies

<mReD> wtf happend to that blaster virus
<mReD> did microsoft get attacked
<]Oxygen[> they pointed www.windowsupdate.com somewhere else
<]Oxygen[> what they should have done is point it at apple.com

<Tarkaan> I distonctly remember saying "extra hot"
<Tarkaan> damn chinese
<living2di> distonctly?
<Tarkaan> you are correct, that was a very ironic typo
<dabba> damn mongorians

<ex-machina> lol there's a guy in hellraiser 3 who kills
people by chucking CDs at them. Presumably they're Win XP
install discs...

<Malefecent> I want to see Blue Man Group
<mrLang> Buy a drum set and watch the Smurfs.  Same thing.

<griffin> would you tongue fuck pagans asshole for 27.4
million?
<jstepka-w> yup
<jstepka-w> i'd do a lot of shit for 27.4 million
<griffin> would you kill your mom?
<jstepka-w> would I get caught?
<griffin> no
<jstepka-w> yes

<+HMetal> isn't it wierd how the obvious things trip you up
and the complex things are easy? LOL
<+_underdog> in other words girls are obvious and masturbating
is complex

<Guilty> Check out who used to own my new IP's
<Guilty> ArabIRC Network

<Sholin> You know, I went to KFC the other day with my Mother,
And she asked them if they had anything fried..

<`Raphael> <venomz> i broke my  finger playen halo 2 much!!!!!
<`Raphael> @_@
<`Raphael> HOW DO YOU BREAK A FINGER PLAING A GAME??
<Rann-chan> Jamming it on the game pad REALLY hard?
<`Raphael> How??
<Rann-chan> Either that or he, like, played it non-stop for 48
hours or something and his fingers were so overstrung that one
fractured when he jabbed a button.
<RichardFox> Could be a stress fracture.
<`Raphael> He said he played it everyday for a month.
<RichardFox> Yup, stress fracture.
<Rann-chan> You know what can cure that? A LIFE.

* Ashfield is now known as Atropos
<-yptosis> Isn't Atropos that desease were you wang turns gray
and falls off?
<Camen> No.
<-yptosis> God damnit, so I didn't need to wash it. That lying
motherfucker.

<rad_ed> NOOOOOO i didn't want to do that no no no no
<Sharkd> what?
<rad_ed> i added honey boo boo to my google news section
<rad_ed> no no no no how do i undo

<Encapsulate> How come you never go shopping with me?
<hep> cause you dont put out
<Encapsulate> Dude, I so do.
<Encapsulate> You even have pictures, that you taunt me with.
<hep> lies!
<Encapsulate> Sure, I was drugged up and unconscious, but I
PUT OUT!
<hep> well yeah you put out THEN
<Encapsulate> You said so!
<hep> but I mean i spent a FORTUNE in roofies!

<jablowme> why do some people associate nerds with small
cocks?
<Jonny-TD> so girls wont like nerds.....duh
<jablowme> those fucking fags.

<phats> damnit, now that I'm checking my mail pretty often I'm
not getting any
<phats> heh
<phats> mail that is

jenmigrant: I've figured it out.  There are two distinct
species of male in the world:  All the men I want, and all the
men I can have.

< leah> you don't win against people like SoundFriend by
debating with the individual person. you win by getting
elected and educating children so that we get less people like
SoundFriend
< SoundFriend> Fewer

<Jay> the only annoying thing about Perl is there's always at
least 10 ways to do the same thing =)
<Ashley> and half of those make absolutely no sense when you
come back to the code 30 minutes later

<TFA|Swoop> I hate being on 14.4..
<n> hah
<chao[i]> ha
<chao[i]> are u kidding
<TFA|Swoop> I can't do anything but talk in irc..
<TFA|Swoop> bored out of my fucking skull
<chao[i]> lets quake swoop
<chao[i]> yeah
<chao[i]> TFA|Swoop was pummelet by chao[i]
<TFA|Swoop> Ok
<TFA|Swoop> I'll start a server.

<Keeper> ooooh, another dead mouse
<Keeper> I think it was a radioactive mouse too, cos as soon
as the mousetrap snapped, the TV reception died for a second
<Deke> keeper has mice?
<Keeper> not anymore :P

<Theogony> odd
<Theogony> one of the playboy playmates kinda looks like my
mom
<Theogony> hmm
<Theogony> quite strange

<Kouban> My friend had a dog that ate a sock once, and it came
out hole x_x
<Chimerasame> ..
<Crimsonmonkey> which hole
<Kouban> FUCKING TYPO DIE ME

[+mrspip]: your right ;)
[+SPo0n]: you're*
[+[SCB]m0yda]: ooooo we got a spelling bot in here ;P
[+SPo0n]: *have
[+SPo0n]: and grammar :P

Pramma: like, this one time at a texas hold'em table, and i
was like "man, lady luck is really smiling on me today...she's
cute too, i'd tap that in a second"
Pramma: and then people started looking at me

<kare> The next Microsoft OS will have a new anti piracy
feature: it will come in an arcade cabinet and you'll need to
insert coins to boot it or start a program

<tsb^blah|fx> beer will get you laid everytime
<tsb^blah|fx> maybe not with an attractive woman
<tsb^blah|fx> or maybe not even a woman at all
<tsb^blah|fx> but you won't know the difference

<Nall> ...you know what's funny? I was expecting to hit my
rock bottom a few minutes ago
<Nall> And yet... here I am, talking about scribbling vaginas
on my chest in order to spooge on myself

<FMJaguar> good, we don't have time for elitists here
* FMJaguar > all of you

<devilgrl> qwasz: im a rocket technician for the govt.
<devilgrl> i used to be a unix admin
<pagan> sure have alot of exp for being 21...
<devilgrl> pagan: i dropped outta school and started working
fulltime when I was 17
<pagan> then the .gov picked you up to work on rockets?
<devilgrl> my friend works for the company, he got me an
interview
<pagan> and they saw your stunning education record, and hired
you right?
<pagan> of course your full of shit, your a girl
<devilgrl> exactly

* drdink ponders getting his dad the Magellan Meridian Gold
GPS
* drwiii watches irony strike as it gets lost in the mail.

<ItBurn|mw> yay tescd cerazeyhes
<ItBurn|mw> crashed
<Celestar|xchat> ItBurn|mw: dude how did you mistype like
THAT?

<AlmtyBob> god my ball-sweat smells good
<AlmtyBob> too bad I have a cold 8(
<AlmtyBob> can hardly smell it
<skmt> yeah.
<skmt> ball sweat has a weird smell.
<SD-Washu> mine fucking stinks
<AlmtyBob> it's like coffee though
<AlmtyBob> doesn't taste as good as it smells
<mdl> AlmtyBob: dude
<mdl> you taste your nutsaq sweat?
<skmt> you only need to sniff your hand after you beat it,
fool.
<AlmtyBob> lets just say it's a good thing my cum smells bad

«Kenty» I got a chick customer's number today. :) I'm so proud
of myself!
«fiend`» Saying "Ma'am, I need your home telephone number for
acount verification." is not something to be proud of

<Mougly> you cant fire me...slaves have to be sold!

<DarkPhan> humm... i want to find some software that will
track eye movements on a webcam
<Spooky42> www.fbi.com/shareware

<Kyou> lemme guess... i'm 12000 in binary?

<Nimduin> Holy fucking shit.
<Nimduin> http://www.mclaren4sale.com/main.html
<Match> Bet you could get that girl you're always talking
about in that car.
<sede> Yeah, the bitch couldn't dodge me in that sweet ride,
I'd wear her like a hood ornament

<Guilty> All she wanted was a good fuck
<Guilty> That will stop the tears
<Guilty> And if not, tears make decent lube

<fm> they say if you do the same thing over and over again ..
you'll get sick of it. I've been cutting school for more days
then I can count and I'm not sick of it yet

<Gothmog> ive got this to say for that pool after about 10:30
at night
<Gothmog> its absolutely fucking freezing
<Zen> arg
<Zen> ur nuts
<Gothmog> yeah they were freezing too

<grifferz> what is more funny is when dalnet EB sends a
message to their mailing lists  saying "don't talk about this
issue, kill the thread" thus ensuring the thread will never,
ever end
<grifferz> it is like a reverse godwin

<Darf> hendrix = god
<WwW> name somthing good hendrix has done the past.. ehmm.. 5
years