bash.org archive

<soapZOMBIE> when you go to college, you'll be the "old guy"
in class
<soapZOMBIE> everyone will say "what the hell is that old guy
doing here at college?"
<demizius> better than the bald guy right?
<soapZOMBIE> i wear hats

<drunkers> do you know who i am?
<vinnieT> nope
<drunkers> i could rip your eyes out and stick them in your
knee and make your knee read a book
<vinnieT> i dont read

<vampyriss> im not a girl
<vampyriss> not yet a woman
<[m1]> so you still tuck?

<@PSU-Kaikou> <MP3> Unknown Artist - Give it a reach around
<MP3>
<@PSU-Kaikou> oh FUCK
<@PSU-Kaikou> er...disregard that..
<+WSBN-DwarfVader> wtf
<+WSBN-DwarfVader> what kind of HOMO music you listening
too???

<[TFF]Metalstar> dunno. if you were gettin bjs from 13 year
olds you would be in jail
<alphaxion|Zzzz> or in japan

<Syzygy> My cock needed some fresh air
Vlad » OH
Vlad » that reminds me....
Vlad » brb

<sara:#i386> - o we reserve the right to be assholes when
we've had a bad day.

<Dryzzid{SAS}> OOOOOW
<Dryzzid{SAS}> I just sat on my nuts :(
* Jaedra stares at Dryzz
<Jaedra> dude...
<Dryzzid{SAS}> What? I sat down the wrong way..
<Dryzzid{SAS}> I crushed one :(

<Vegeta> I would go through anything for you
<Vegeta> Lets start with your bank account

<steelcap> Imagine there was a way to make a monitor give off
like way more radiation
<steelcap> and give people cancer remotely
<steelcap> thatd be an awesome trojan feature..

<Phylitsa> I think i found out how to get back on the forum!
:D
<Phylitsa> I need to delete something called "my cookies"
<Phylitsa> unless the guy was making a perverted joke

Casalyn88: now i feel branded like i can't go out and have
other boys now because theyll see it and think i get around a
lot
Tovarich89: ummm, casie.....
Tovarich89:
Casalyn88: ok i mean then they'll KNOW i get around a lot
Tovarich89: better

< st2> I'm sure if you're posting naked pictures of yourself,
there will be a lot of people around to help you.
* drusillia glares at st2
* st2 pulls out the anti-glare screen.

(Matt^^^) fenrir's gf is a quad processor solaris box

<nakke> I should edit my Notes views so I can mark emails from
my colleagues as "sux"

<Lithium^> I always attract either scary men/ugly men/
psychopaths
<Smess> what's your profile URL?
<Lithium^> Smess: gaydar/uk18
<Smess> "I like making new friends all the time, especially if
you`re a big bear" - yep.. think I've found your problem.

<Measure> hey cao how can I win back raltash's love?
<Measure> I think I pissed her off
<Caoilin> uhm
<Caoilin> stop saying she has a huge hairy clit for one
<Measure> yeah...
<Measure> good idea

<@dos622> apparntly back in the 70s they called cock tube
steak
<AppleRuly> ahh
<@dos622> but in the 50s tube steak was hot dog
<@dos622> as in the food
<AppleRuly> my grandma was rofl
<@dos622> what?
<AppleRuly> i told her the tube steak thing and she goes
"you're dirty"
<AppleRuly> i just said do you like tube steak
<AppleRuly> and she goes "you're dirty"
<@dos622> lol

<hot^> Do to budget cuts, the light at the end of the tunnel
will be turned off.

<Antarius> Say 'silk' 5 times, now spell 'silk': What do cows
Drink?
<kruqnut> milk?

<grap3|saturn_music_files> whats a good big hentai site?
<Ryoga> grap3, Japan

uuu join/#unix (Hes^GoT^[email protected])..
<Hes^GoT^LiNuX> I Have Linux Perl Can i Download Gnome???

<aqualung> that's weird, "douche" is the french word for
shower
<aqualung> but in english, when used with the word "bag" it
becomes an insult
<lefty> lol, you stupid SHOWER BAG
<aqualung> and it also sorta sounds like germany's name in
german
<aqualung> if anyone were to associate germany with showers,
it would be the jews, not the french ;)
<lefty> yeah, but what's even weirder is the french have a
word for something they never use

<null> glasnost: what version of the internet did you install?
/
<glasnost> null: 5.0

<TFreak> She was like, "are you enjoying this"
<TFreak> And I was like thinking, dude, it feels like I'm
fucking a bowl of spagetti-Os or something.

Ps3000: what are you doing tomorrow at 3:45?
SocialistNinja: waking up

<_flipmode> CinderZ you only get voice if you show your true
love for pokemon, change your name to ILOVEPOKEMON and join #
gunclub and #goths

* dasunt has his 12-step plan:  'How to Achieve Sex If You Are
A Geek'
<dasunt> 1) Convert to homosexuality.
<dasunt> 2) Find another geek who has also followed this plan.
<zoo> it's that easy?
* pig has a 1-step plan
<dasunt> 3..12) Give money to Dasunt.
<pig> 1) stop being a fucking geek

< dev> it's getting so bash.org is better to read than irc

* Ryo curses his swiss-cheese memory
* Grue curses his fondue memory. It's all melty and stuff.
o_o;

<Nate> NathanG - just a tip - on that factory8.com page, you
spelled "their" worng.
<cyn> Nate: just a tip - on that last line, you spelled
"wrong" wrong

<rawkus> fuckin women.
<rawkus> i call for booty and get a lecture on racism
<rawkus> wtf?

o0zeman: brb, need fluids.
haq: coincidentally, I have to pee.
haq: let's get together and have a double-blind mountain dew
taste test
o0zeman: haha

<sexygurlah> well ya he's kinda nice n everything..
<mAdmAn6> i guess its ok with you
<sexygurlah> we had sex together already, it was pretty great,
actually
<mAdmAn6> oohh.. thats fast
<ohlyo> erm, now i wanna get laid.
<sexygurlah> one thing annoys me - my balls slap so hard when
i'm having sex with him
<ohlyo> o_O
<mAdmAn6> ugh. you still wanna get laid?

<TheDingo> OH SHIT.. i was supposed to read the communist
manifesto for political science..
<Novasol> just read a Windows manual. same thing

<Adiemus> what country is .mk
<B|1nD> mexiko

<Imajin> I bet you havent heard of Hingham MA either.
<Foom> no, but i've heard of MA.
<||bass> ive seen MA on the map....
<||bass> it's purple!
<||bass> :D

<Phreak407> why the fuck is there purple m&ms in this bag?
<Anti-Social> Because they're tryin to tell you you're gay
<Phreak407> oh

<Comrade_Ez> watching Teletubbies now
<Comrade_Ez> and I must say
<Comrade_Ez> that fucking baby-sun-thing is fucking scary
<Comrade_Ez> man
<Comrade_Ez> I wish I was stoned right now
<Comrade_Ez> this looks like just the perfect program for
stoned people

(rooster): So, are you hard at work
(rooster): or
(rooster): HARD, at work

<iggypop> licking my own sweaty balls > quicktime

[hardlined] someone give me a phone number
(timmo) 867-5309
[hardlined] area code?
(timmo) 801
[hardlined] whats the name "we" should as for
(timmo) jenny
[hardlined] ;-)
[hardlined] the subscriber u have dialed is not in service

(@Josh) do you know where your children are
(~cypher) in the bottom of the sock on the floor
(@equin0x) ..
(@Josh) for your mother to find?
! @Josh thinks his mom caught him a few times
(~cypher) its not going to clean itself :S

<@len> someone just asked me how to print half a page
<@len> "do you type in .5?"

<Derian> haha I knkow
<Derian> knknow?
<Derian> er
<Derian> knknow?
<Derian> damnit
<Derian> knkow
<Derian> that's incredibly hard to type on purpose..... try it
<Derian> it keeps coming out knknow
<Derian> instead of knknow
<Derian> er
<Derian> damnit!

<LoKuanYu> I should drived around town with my notebook. I
want to map out the "free" wireless spots.
<LoKuanYu> ^_^
<emc2serv> heh, theres an idea.
<loser\Away> war driving
<LoKuanYu> You never know when the government might be chasing
after you and you need a quick access to the internet
<loser\Away> to tells us about it?
<emc2serv> lol
<LoKuanYu> lol

<KNG_SNK> ok i was at work today
<KNG_SNK> and two ppl were missing...
<KNG_SNK> and this guy's office was locked
<KNG_SNK> but i knew there was someone in there... VERY quiet
too
<KNG_SNK> so me and some buds went over to the next building
<KNG_SNK> to try to peek in
<KNG_SNK> and man... they were goin at it
<KNG_SNK> but we could clearly see humping action

<[OZ\Lt]TheGodOfDeath[Away]> Is Janet Reno your mother?
Sister? Lover?
<Crimson_Dynamo> all of the above
* [OZ\Lt]TheGodOfDeath[Away] runs away screaming

<Terra> there i was at a donkey stall, there was a sign there
saying in english : would u like to ride on your own ass?
<Terra> so i was like ??
<UPC_Nemo> Like?
<UPC_Nemo> Did you ride the badass assride?
<zuhrich_> lol

danamania: wtf... I search on altavista for my page
danamania: and an ad at the bottom goes:
danamania: Find danamania here! www.ebay.com.au - New & second
hand!
danamania: I can get a whole new me!
Vash: or a slighty used one, with a few dents

<ph0rce> this is like turning into a war
<ph0rce> back like vietnam
<ph0rce> INCOMING NETSPLIT! GET THE FUCK DOWN
<ph0rce> INCOMING BOGIES INCOMING BOGIES
<ph0rce> RETURN FIRE
<ph0rce> *dos attack*

<sekira> it was like 4 PM and my friends grandma msg'd him on
aim
<sekira> and she asked if he was still busy doing his
homework.
<sekira> I was really bored, so I went on his comp and said
"wtf?" and she replied: "wait til five?"

<Posty> what is it about the lead singer from Garbage that
makes me wanna fuck 'er 'til my willy falls off?
<Threeboy> its cause she looks like a guy.

<BloodFromStone> XP probably has a button that summons local
monkeys to brutalize my isp.
<[Sl]Ashy> no, bfs
<[Sl]Ashy> I'm afraid that first the monkeys duct tape you to
a chair and taunt you, then proceed to take off your clothing,
take pictures for later blackmail, and -then- rip your ISP's
server to shreds.
<BloodFromStone> o_o
<BloodFromStone> XP is dangerous.
<[Sl]Ashy> Yes.
<Iepetus> yeah
<[Sl]Ashy> Handle with care.
<Iepetus> monkeys seem cute and all
<Iepetus> but when that happens... it's no fun
<Iepetus> ...
<Iepetus> or so I hear

<Kyle|> im making a SHELL for WINDOWS that LOOKS and FEELS
like the REAL STANDALONE OS THAT WILL BE DONE NOT SOON!
<Urganite> what you mean to tell me
<Urganite> is that you're going to create a windows program
<Urganite> that just looks like what you want your OS to be?
<Urganite> ...
<Urganite> that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my
life
<Peasant> Someone should make a DHTML OS
<Kyle|> peasant: dont give me ideas

<K8> well the theme was aincient history
<josh_ip_te> oh,
<josh_ip_te> and you went as a viking?
<K8> and my friend had some home made costumes
* josh_ip_te wouldve gone as a black michael jackson

<BlackNovember> Yesterday when I woke up I found my missing
Borknagar CD under my pillow.
<WinterDemon> Yeah, that's the "Cum residue on your hand
fairy"s way of repaying you for the left over man juice on
your hand after you finished beating off and passed out with
your hand under the pillow.
<BlackNovember> Whoa, so if i jerk off tonight and put my hand
under my pillow, I'll wake up with a Rotting Christ album
under it?
<WinterDemon> Yes, but not the album with a bonus disc, that
would be too greedy

<Trivbot0> What is South Korea's national dish called?
<Logic_BomB> rats
<Logic_BomB> rice
<Logic_BomB> children

* Teufel is a moron
<_wEaSeL_> well said
<Teufel> I tore up my room looking for the receipt for my
'broken speakers' to return them; when all I had to do is plug
them in

* PokeSmot pokes everyone to sleep
<+JohnTaSays> ur nick somehow makes me keep thinkin of smoke
pot
<@Pyroman> ...

[20:21] <cooldaw13>  2nd Hint: 176*   30.0 secs & 12 Points
Remaining
[20:22] <cooldaw13>  3rd Hint: 176*   15.0 secs & 6 Points
Remaining
[20:22] <StealthStalker> 1760
<StealthStalker> 1761
<StealthStalker> 1762
<StealthStalker> i give up
<cooldaw13>  Times up!  The answer was ->  1763  <-
<StealthStalker> OMG

Cypher : damnit i hate windows 98
Cypher : "look, you've updated the network drivers, INSERT THE
CD BEFORE THE COMPUTER EXPLODES!!"

<ThisIsASentenceInANick> I AM TAPPING THREE WHITE
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> CASTING MONEYSHOT ON TOM
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> YOUR TURN
* Tomko awaits anxiously for HAWT STEAMY MANSAWCE
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> IT IS MY TURN AGAIN
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> I TAP OUT AND SUMMON YAWGMOTH'S
SODOMITE
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> I ATTACK TOM WITH IT
<ThisIsASentenceInANick> DO YOU BLOCK?  Y/N
<Tomko> N

<Stoned> ever had someone do a numerology chart for you?
<Duck> no
<Veng> no but I got a hand job off a nurse once

<BoneyCork> irc operators have a musty operator scent
<CG> na ima clean
<BoneyCork> when you go into some houses you can tell they
have dogs, others you can tell they smoke
<BoneyCork> i bet if you go into CG's house you think, "irc
operator"

<eViL_fOoTwEaR> Now. Do you know what nickserv is?
<slsc83jvc03> nickserv is somthing that is mean to people for
no reason

<Caldavien> omg I think Im gonna puke
<Mdar> ??
<Caldavien> I was browsing bash.org
<Caldavien> and some one said some thing about this
"tubgirl.jpg"
<Caldavien> and I did a search
<Mdar> you did a google for tubgirl?
<Caldavien> yes
<Caldavien> it was bad

<SpaZZtic|webpage> the bitch from next door was standing at
her window watching me hang out my washing
<SkewtuR> hah get some tampons hold them in water..hang them
on the line when she loox yell Yeah we recycle

<dwerg> qiv -femitd 10 `find /home/giel/pr0n | egrep -v
("horse"|"animal")`
<dwerg> Heheh, oeps.
<giel> lol