bash.org archive

<rob`> o/` Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the
Lord o/`
<JakeStone> rob:  Religious pr0n?
ð Kaijin can't come up with a next verse that s pronlike and
scans.
<JakeStone> o/~ He was hammering the women hard and now they
are quite sore o/~
ð Alaric can't remember enough of the Battle Hymn of the
Republic to filk it
<rob`> o/` he hath loosed the fateful lightning of his
terrible swift sword o/`
<rob`> I think the lyrics filk themselves. :)

<s|urpee> like seriously... "Book Appreciation Month"?????
<s|urpee> Who the fuck thought that one up?
<Argent-> s|urpee - someone who gets hawt talking dewey
decimals
<s|urpee> 017.223 JER
* s|urpee shivers happily
<daedalus`> i want to see official geek month... a month where
geeks are
no percicuted and bullies get hit up for lunch money.... ...
that wouls
rock
<daedalus`> hahaha
<Argent-> I want 'throw a fat old guy a mercy fuck' month.
* Argent- coughs.
<Argent-> Oh, come on- that was funny ,)

<RingLass> I'm
<RingLass> leaving
<RingLass> night all
* RingLass removes her enter key

<tomg> old, ancient, shouldn't be used, replaced with
something better
<[ric]> yeh, like the excuses I get when I am dumped

<Yoshio> OMG
<Yoshio> MY FIREWALL
<Yoshio> IS BLOCKING
<Yoshio> PORN!!
<`Bloodlust> lmao
<Yoshio> ahh much better..
<Yoshio> although i am looking at tubgirl.
<Yoshio> ewww.
<Yoshio> that so cant be real

<eddy> school was ok except for the lack of beer

<undrewb> I keep telling you, you can come work for me
<MMouse> what would i be doing?
<Tippytoes> cleaning his house
<undrewb> delphi programming :)
<MMouse> urgh
<MMouse> would i have to learn delphi?

(koch): !need some help
(koch): !anyone in private please
(@Lynkx): koch: what the hell are you doing
(@dc): hes an idiot
(@Lynkx): !i want a vagina
(@Lynkx): shit
(@Lynkx): don`t werk

<tps^snoogans> i only yell at my penis when moms not home

<eddy> when the nurse was trying to guess how many units of
alcohol I drank a week it was like playing higher or lower

[giR`] WTF am i supposed to do with all of these TV's!!!!
[zimm] ever heard of surround vision?
[zimm] daisy chain them or something

<mightyflo> and "what technologies do you like working with
best?"
<mightyflo> that's an odd question
<redbatszu> dusteating nanobots?
<mightyflo> i should hook those up to the x10 remote
<mightyflo> i could clean the house from my chair

@MetalMilitia{|cC|}: I never been to the states
@MetalMilitia{|cC|}: and I WILL NOT cross the boarder
@Raged|work: its better that way
@Raged|work: we don't need ya
@MetalMilitia{|cC|}: but ur women do ;)
@MetalMilitia{|cC|}: they all want some of my Canadian beef
baby !
@Sile: i crossed the border into Canada at Niagra Falls once
@Sile: i was sitting there thinking "damn, the canadian chicks
are hot!"
@Sile: then i realized that they were all american tourists

<CodeMason> I never sleep.
<CodeMason> I just lapse into alcohol-induced catatonia on a
regular basis.

<lewpoo> whats the most advanced topic in java?
<joeblowgt> lewpoo: not getting kickbanned in #java

<+SROL> Megaman is REALLY hard to play without a gamepad
<+Redlof> what are you playing it with?
<+SROL> keyboard
<+Redlof> What? I love the keyboard.
<+Redlof> just pretend it's commander keen.
<+SROL> I can't get the hang of it
<+SROL> I'm used to playing it with my thumbs
<+SROL> So I picked up the keyboard and tried playing it with
my thumbs :D
<+SROL> That didn't work :(

<Grim13> Mariah Carey's cleavage got nominated for "Worst
onscreen couple"

<Cringer> By an 8-1 vote Monday, the members of the U.S.
Supreme Court collectively resolved to lose their virginity by
Dec. 31, 2002.
<danhon> Who gave the dissenting opinion?
<Cringer> I bet Scalia.

<sev> asus makes shitty mobos
<sev> overpriced too.
--> omega ([email protected]) has joined #
hell
--- ChanServ gives channel operator status to omega
--- ChanServ sets mode +a #hell omega
<asus> loud out laugh's
<asus> i have 3
<asus> :P
<sev> cool
<sev> i have 1
<sev> but it's dead
<sev> ;)
<omega> I have 0
* omega wonders what the convo was
<sev> japanese love slaves.
<omega> oh
<omega> yeah, I have 0

<revmoo> does flock() not work on ntfs?
<Hendrix-> only if you compile with -lshepherd

< S7L> Would you guess the nationality of the genius behind
this code: datapublikacjijava=new Date
(przetarg.jakistartpublikacjirok.value,
przetarg.jakistartpublikacjimiesiac.value-1,
przetarg.jakistartpublikacjidzien.value)

<orion> man
<orion> fuck pints
<orion> our corner store is selling QUARTS now
<Hat> Where do you live, Ireland?

<Prophecy> didnt know i was offering u a job
<Buchwald> can you?  please?  mine sucks.
<Prophecy> u can clean my toilets if u want
<Prophecy> or polish my shoes
<Prophecy> do u know how to spit shine
<Prophecy> ?
<Buchwald> spit shine?  well when i was younger, i made some
movies that i'm not proud of...
<Buchwald> oh.. wait... you meant shoes

<Threeboy> i think advertising other channels is like bay
employees going into sears and shouting "HUDSON BAY COMPANY
NEEDS MORE CUSTOMERS"

<sparks> got the house to myself for the evening
<Robert> bbl
<Robert> hehe enjoy ;)
<sparks> guess I'll invite a bunch of friends over and have a
party and play rap music
<sparks> by which I mean I'll order a pizza and nair my legs

<TNK> sweden is the most wasted land in the world- so many
beautiful girls, and because it's cold there they wear too
many clothes =]

<Carlos2> anyone know any good-tasting food with no sugar,
fat, carbs, calories, cholesterol, or other junk?
<Wizmo> error
<Wizmo> error
<Wizmo> carlos you broke my logic engine
<Anti_Hero> uhh
<Coreyback> Sounds like water is your best bet.
<Anti_Hero> carrots?
<Carlos2> what? im hungry and slightly overweight.
<Wizmo> so you swallow your saliva
<Carlos2> i was thinking of air, but thats not filling enough.

(During another round of mega splits on DALnet)
<Guest51394> how do u get into the servers?
<priz> you can't.
<priz> if you walked into a McDonalds when the kitchen was on
fire, do you think they'd take your order?

·Serfer· Let's not fight. Let's hug. For forty minutes. Nude.
·pHluid· 10 more minutes till I start my lunch break. Go ahead
and grease up.
·Serfer· Not enough time.
·pHluid· Must be a lot of you to grease.

<agu> TETRIS FOR XBOX?!?!? - that should really push xbox to
the limit ;)

<ChafedNut> I just downloaded the internet
<ChafedNut> it's pretty fly
<Batt0usai> Chafednut: can you burn it on a cd for me please
<ChafedNut> I will try...it may have some copyright
protections
<Batt0usai> if you could fit it in a floppy it would be better
actually
<Batt0usai> try zipping it
<ChafedNut> ok

<eugenics/#help> hi, i was going to search for how to cook an
omlette online.. but i dont know how to spell it

<fragglet> ralphis = fat
<Ralphis> i am not!
<darknation> small objects are orbiting you
<darknation> planet ralphis
<darknation> the Gas Giant

<CreeDC> rsw: is the neice cute?
<rswAFK> it's not born yet.
<Dodee> that's young, even for matt.
<rswAFK> she's underage, anyway.
<CreeDC> rsw: but it's a girl for sure right?

* BrooKiki is NOT a bad person.
BrooKiki: I'm not even a mean person.  In fact, if people like
that were drowned at birth like they SHOULD be, I'd be Miss
Freaking Congeniality, dammit!

<[DOtR]Kudos|> I CANT GET IN
<Steele{GONE}> i said that to a virgin once

<dodge> i should be in bed myself ...
<dodge> oh wait, i am

<psychonate> A Mac is like a prostitute.
<psychonate> Sure they look good, but your wallet will feel a
lot lighter after getting one.

<Patrick> my mom just gave me 10 more dollars
<Patrick> i feel like saying
<Patrick> "thanks for supporting my drinking habit mom"

<DooD> All of the Kmart's in iraq will be closed, and reopen
as Targets in the next two weeks...

<tester> what did I miss?
<maklic> well
<maklic> i was just fucking AdrameleK's momma
<maklic> other than that nothing much
<tester> send the log

<Donut> Water Block Round-Up : 19 of the biggest baddest water
blocks rounded up and tested, just for you guys out there that
like your action wet and heavily overclocked.
<Donut> FREUD IS ROLLING IN HIS GRAVE

<sic_> where the fuck could i find some decent fucking
wallpaper
<C4thY> home depot
<C4thY> hahahhahahahahahhahahahhahahhahahahahahhahhahhahah you
walked right into that one dipshit

<ricochet> cubicsrube: if any MAJOR problems ever occur with
winxp .. it will be PURELY hardware based.. ie. it has NOTHING
to do with the operating system

<D3S> driving is like sex
<yeager> D3S, driving is nothing like sex
<yeager> if it was, I would hardly ever get to drive
<yeager> and when i did, i would regret it afterwards

<+aisha-fan> dude
<+aisha-fan> my moms boss brougt in a "new" penteium I
<+aisha-fan> those things r so old their obsoleet
<@MewMew[WC3]> As is correct spelling, I presume.

* Fox-20 is down with gcc (yeah you know me)

(ManiPan84) so what are you doing?
(OoO0O0Oo0o) taking pieces of conversations and manipulating
them to suit my sadistic needs

johnlnames : Manny... do you know any places to get free
music?
mannyfresh2 : the internet.

MetalMantisX: ozzy's daughter obviously got none of her
fathers talent
KennyGetsum: both of the kids look like the mom.. ud never
guess they were even related to Ozzy
MetalMantisX: his other daughter looks like him though
MetalMantisX: the smart one, thats not on the show
KennyGetsum: ya cause she was concieved while ozzys blood
alcohol content was under 20%

BagmanJon: one sec theres a dude from the church here who
wants me to buttrape him
BagmanJon: brb
BagmanJon: Turns out it was a chick.
BagmanJon: my lucky day eh?

<Slayer> tbh i cba
<[S3E]Busy> there u go
<[S3E]Busy> an entire generation in one sentence
<Slayer> two abbrivs in one sentance im good
<[S3E]Busy> i think we have different outlooks on life
<Slayer> notice i abbrieviated abbrieviate
<[S3E]Busy> *sigh*

<Berzerker> what are you goign to pick? 
<ding> HAWT PAWKETS

<Comrade> Dude, so the other day after school, this crazy
evangelical lady randomly came up to me.
<Comrade> So she was tryin to get me to convert to
Christianity and I just ignored her. But I only caught the
last few words which were, "Jesus is in all of us!!"
<Comrade> So in an attempt to get her to go away, I said,
"Lady, if Jesus was in me I would file charges for rape."

<FrozenBeefLog> hey lets all make sexual symbols
<Slicey> 8==e
<FrozenBeefLog> 8======*
<FrozenBeefLog> hah mines bigger
<Slicey> yours has an exploded end

<+DangerMan> I liked cold weather a lot better when I was fat
<bmwii> ya, an extra 30 pounds helps through the winter =)
<+ZombiEater> ..or a jacket

<Barracuda_Sanchez> i have a pubic hair on my moniter
<Barracuda_Sanchez> i thought it was a comma

<D3KK0N> if a woman broke in you had a little thing with and
left you some panties and a card....you wouldnt be happy?
<bluewolf> er for a start i'm female

<RikisuuDelta> i'm glad my parents dont play quake, they'd
frag my ass and tell me it's dinner time

* Shadowe`shopping has joined #gamesurge
<Shadowe`shopping> listen
<Shadowe`shopping> word of advice
<Shadowe`shopping> NEVER use an electric razor to shave your
scrotum
<Shadowe`shopping> christ
<Br34ch> wtf?
<Br34ch> Why?
<Br34ch> Elaborate, please
<Shadowe`shopping> you have no idea how long it took me to get
the bleeding to stop

<CrypticB> I heard the funniest quote on the radio on the way
home
<CrypticB> that they are using surgical strikes on military
targets only, and only those military targets that wish to
fight, and not the soldiers who don't want to fight....
<CrypticB> how do you determine that?
<wo1f> they spin crucifixes and bomb in whichever direction
jesus' feet point

<indigo> redhat has become a thing of its own, apart from
linux
<indigo> it's the entropy of linux combined with the
uselessness of a corporate product

<miz> man, you just pushed the geek meter right off the scale
with the combined MS bash and LOTR reference

<NinjaStu> ack! Scotch Irish on my keyboard!
<NinjaStu> if i start typing funny
<NinjaStu> my keyboard is intoxicated

duckstab: Oh and as if i'm the only guy that'd ask God for a
handjob. He INVENTED the penis, guys.

<@Jaxxin> your momma's so fat, I want to have sex with her and
not tell anyone else :(

<Dracleath> Dual wielding great swords with monkey grip
<Staberinde> I have a monkeygrip
<Staberinde> they won't let me use it in public though

Dave: I support R. Kelly.  I saw the video, and that bitch
wanted it. The theory is, if the girl is walking in the mall
without her parents.. like alone or just with friends... then
she's ready to get some dick.
Banderon:  Dave, look!  Those 12 year olds don't have a parent
with them! Go! Go!

<Saiy> Pringles is the new masturbation fad
<Splat> Which must mean that Pringles is AKIN to...
<Splat> ...
<Splat> CANNED SEX!
<Ed> Pringles is the new masturbation?
<Ed> I guess now it's "Once you pop the fun stops"