bash.org archive

<Charles> I've got mock exams network
<Charles> oops .... *next week
<Neil> now theres an example of someone who spends too much
damn time on the computer.

(InkBlot) From CNN: Rumsfield: Turkey plans will go ahead.
(InkBlot) good to see Thanksgiving won't be canceled this
year.

- Elim is now known as Elim-playing-with-penis
(@Elim-playing-with-penis) weeeeeeeee
- who is now known as penis
(penis) yay
(penis) !
! penis plays with elim
(@Elim-playing-with-penis) yea you like that penis...weeee

ErikB -> you know what is funny? i can measure my level of
health by playing quake2. when i eat bad, sleep irregular and
drink much, i play like shit. when i skate, take vitamin pills
and sleep good i rule the scene. vitamin C is the key

<Ban> Good lord. My sunburn is peeling and there is another
layer of sunburn under my sunburn.
<Sigma> just cut your skin off and tan the muscle

<Random> Yes. Your testicles, if not stopped, will slaughter
the hapless opposition.

<Sabrebutt> So, I started learning Java today.
<tacojon> eww
<tacojon> i hope you washed your hands afterwards

<Spamizbad> minix is the baddass hardcore 16bit unix from the
rough side of town

<wasabi>  wish I could call up a friend right now
<wasabi> and say "hey wanna go grab food"
<wasabi> BUT I CAN"T
<wasabi> oshi put the notice back in the topic. =(
--- Oshi has changed the topic to: Cosplay.com - WANTED:
Dallas Otaku to hang out with Wasabi.
<wasabi> thx

<Logic_BomB> scary
<Logic_BomB> my brother just corrected the spelling of analy
<Logic_BomB> and i wonder why he has only male friends at
times......
<Logic_BomB> and here i was thinking all the yelling from the
vents i hear is just them playing quake3

<Mike> WTF
<Mike> MY TOASTER IS ON FUCKING FIRE
<Mike> BRB

[@{Defenderz}] heh... you know this is all the british's
fault, technically
[@{Defenderz}] I don't blame Britain... but... it still is
thier flaw they sparked this whole thing :-P
[+Dark_Brood] Yeah they went to america in the first place

<weechee> <--- is now 7.5 months preggers member?
<ThndrWolf> awwwww suck. How'd that happen?

<tfr> i got tired of cyber sex before instant messengers were
invented
<JeremyC> hahaha
<JeremyC> got worn out on 4800bps BBSes did ya
<tfr> yeah, +++NO CARRIER just before an orgasm is frustrating

<_Godless_> what can say to the ex that killed a part of you
that you'll never get back ... with out souding bitter?

* FiShYmAn kills Noddy
* FiShYmAn sells the film to ld saying its olsen twins for $50
[Noddy ] rfol
[Noddy ] he'd get off on it either way

<LordSuggs> and i got a new 19" monitor at work
<DeLorean> I can just imagine THAT interview; "...and how big
was the monitor at your last job?"
<LordSuggs> heh
<LordSuggs> well my monitor isnt the only thing about me thats
massive ;)
<DeLorean> heh
<DeLorean> ego

<MrFreeze> !google turkey+baster
<drug|THC> http://am-i-pregnant.com/homeinse.shtml
<djcrom> see, my bot rocks

<ToXiC> i bet in < 2 years, when someone get's pulled over by
the police, they will hear "Can I please have your MSN
Passport"

<[oQp]> anyone ever used Delta Airlines here?
<alec_eso> i have
<[oQp]> how is it?
<carlsb3rg> They always come down

Mike G4 007: return [[HotChick alloc] initWithCupSize:C];
dorkremi: :-|
dorkremi: if ([girl wantSex] != YES) [self setLocation:JAIL];
Mike G4 007: undefied reference: JAIL
dorkremi: typedef enum { HOME, JAIL, UP_YOUR_ASS } places;
dorkremi: There.

<@nuclear_> anyone know about a/c systems in cars?
<@lucidguy> they blow.

<Courtland> im the only one with a hot sister
<Rav> to bad u cant do anything about it
<Rav> or can you?  0_o
<Courtland> I wouldnt do that
<novasatori> you know you'd let her give you a bj or whack off
to her stripping for you if she let you
<Courtland> its not that I think the actual doing of it is
wrong
<Courtland> its just having to think about it afterwards

<Enygma> ?Ú?× s?Ú
<Enygma> I love japanese text without the support for it. I
feel like Im reading a bunch of cheat codes.

<Angelz> ha
<Angelz> I did not get flooded off!
* Angelz ([email protected]=) Quit (Excess flood)

Rabidplaybunny87: It is better to be pissed off than pissed
on.
DAGREATONE951: Tell that to r. kelly.

<Lint> too bad the onion wont be allowed to print under
martial law.
<Spam_Man> is that where ninjas patrol the streets?

<brokenpodium> dude im about to talk to some kid from my high
school that tried to kill himself when he got drunk
<JaaLin> thats fucked up
<brokenpodium> im going to ask if he wants to get hammered
with me

<@SpAz-o-Licious> i got this dude i know laied like 3 weeks
ago... he was like trippin out cause his gf wanted to fuck him
so bad... so i told him what to do and he left.
<@SpAz-o-Licious> the next day he came in and said this...
<@SpAz-o-Licious> <@{118th}DJ_Kazul> sex is better than cs!!!
<@[Milo]> maybe on a pub
<@SpAz-o-Licious> lol!
<@Aunt_Jemima> haha

(SaMaNtHa^) as long as you're not attracted to chipmunks
(MarK^MacLeaN) i'm not
(MarK^MacLeaN) except for that whole chipmunk raping incident
(MarK^MacLeaN) poor lil guy
(MarK^MacLeaN) girl girl.. i mean girl lol
(SaMaNtHa^) homosexuality and beastiality all rolled into one
(MarK^MacLeaN) yeah it was a tough year

<bytraper> you idiots!!!
<Synoptica> yeah i confess

Frost: :p
Frost: lol dood
Frost: my brother and his friend come home just now
Frost: and theres 5 kids coming up the street running
Frost: im like wtf
ape: lol
Frost: and he tells me they are chasing him and his friend
Frost: so i go out there like wtf fags what do you want
Frost: and they said my little brother and his friend hit some
lady in the head with a rock and shes bleeding
ape: ROFL
Frost: man my brother is dumb
Frost: im gonna let them beat him up
ape: thats the funniest shit ive heard in a long time
Frost: :P

<toe2toe> the part i like is where IRAQ's going "we got
nothing"
<toe2toe> and US is going "PFFFT WE'RE GONNA TAKE YOU OUT"
<toe2toe> and then
<toe2toe> North Koreas going "CHECK OUT OUR NUKES, BUDDY"
<toe2toe> and US is going "Hey... are you iraq? no? THEN STAY
OUT OF IT"

<@ImmenseMalevolentCanisLupis> Linux is like a pair of boxers
without the tag cut off. So free but so uncomfortable.

(@Dalby) You have encountered the following error while using
Windows Media Player:
(@Dalby) Error# C00D0BC2
(@Dalby) Sorry, no more help is available for this problem at
this time.
(@Dalby) cool support

<Alamias> So, how is things with you Waldo?
<Joshua> things are just things
<Joshua> kicked a midterm's ass
<Joshua> tire
<Joshua> *tired
<Alamias> Cool..  I always hated midterms
<Lexx> isnt that a pregnant lady?

<RAPEAPE> you know, I get a whole new level of enjoyment from
the wizard of oz now that I realize that most everyone in the
movie is dead now

<radish> id root you, but im busy trying to work out why it is
that whenever i
get paid a series of bills arrive for just about the same
amount of money

<langdon> i put my britney spears doll on my speaker.
<langdon> if i get real low to my desk.
<langdon> i can see up her skirt!

<Daimyou> SUPERMARKET!
* Daimyou starts rapping
<Daimyou> SUPAH MARKEEEEEET!!!!111111
<Daimyou> YOU HAVE TEH CHEESE AND TEH VEGGIEZ
<Daimyou> AND TEH TROUTTTTT
<Daimyou> SUPAH MARKEEEEEET!!!!111111
<Daimyou> YAYAY I RIDE AROUND IN TEH SHOOPPPPPING KAAAARTS
<Daimyou> AND THEN I GO THROUGH THE TAAAAAAYKEOUT
<Daimyou> I MEAN CASHIER
<Daimyou> SUPAH MARKEEEEEET!!!!111111
<Daimyou> BUT THEN I DON'T HAVE TEH MONEYZZZZ
<Daimyou> SO MY MOM PAAAAAYS FORRRRRR ITTTTT
<Daimyou> SUPAH MARKEEEEEET!!!!111111
<Daimyou> THE ENDZ0RZ

<Dilbert_>  is a pregnancy test kit, in bad taste as a bday
present?

<blender> mmm halloween candy
<BloodNose> kid
<blender> adult
<sevr> sounds like a match made in nambla to me
* BloodNose moves closer to blender
* blender runs in horror

<Fickle> I dunno if this fried waffle thing is a good idea,
kelsey
<kelseyB> it might be commercially available
<Fickle> right.  It's already been bought by McD's
<Fickle> called the McFucking Coronary

<Nozomu> ted: and no one has ever crashed a movie theater into
the pentagon
<rogue> noz: they might.  we should be careful.

<Darric> Ok, so this guy's playing golf with a priest.
<Darric> And he's really bad, so every time after one bad putt
after another, he's like "FUCK I MISSED THE FUCKING HOLE"
<[PervertedMonk]> k
<[PervertedMonk]> ...
<Darric> Next hole... swing... putt... "FUCK I MISSED"
<Darric> And the priest becomes a little unnerved
<[PervertedMonk]> obviously
<Darric> So he says "You really shouldn't keep saying that, or
the Lord may well strike you down"
<Darric> Next hole: Swing... putt... "FUCK I MISSED!"
<Darric> And then there's a rumbling in the clouds, and a
lightning bolt strikes the priest dead
<Darric> And a voice overhead... "FUCK I MISSED"

I-n-v-i-s-i-o-n  Netsplit Detected. «irc.right.asscheek
irc.left.asscheek» [6:56am]

*** NormDragon has quit IRC (Quit: c:\dos c:\dos\run run\dos\
run)

<cha0s-> Dude, this one time I was playing mortal kombat as
Kano... and I did the fatality on my opponent and I go "ULTRA
COMBO FATALITY NIGGER WHAT" and my mom heard me :(

Rangsk: why does everyone spell it "grammar"
Rangsk: fuck

<Lorien> I have identical twins. One's a back up.
<AnIndexOfMetals> She's kept in a box in the attic.
<Lorien> lol
<Lorien> Very much the opposite.
<AnIndexOfMetals> In the cellar.

<Wilik> i'd download the .txt version of the bible
<Wilik> but it might corrupt my computer

<FifthFactor> he said he's sell it if you want
<Wolf4dk> For a buck?
<Wolf4dk> That's all I got
<FifthFactor> hah. no.... a little more
<Wolf4dk> what does he want for it?
<OneVerySickpuppy> 2 bucks!
<FifthFactor> without the engine i think he wants $2500
canadian
<OneVerySickpuppy> ack.. thats like 10$ american, too much

<phantom> damn.
<phantom> All these people and no discussion going on?
<drwiii> oh, we're talking, it's just encoded with
rot-infinity.
<drwiii> once the encoder hits infinity all the traffic will
come spilling through.
<phantom> uh.., either you're bullshitting me, or I've just
lost all interest. Maybe both.

<Justin> Sluts are like web hosts - they spend all their time
going down.

<SaraMarie> the houston texans
<SaraMarie> how original
<toast_> do they have an open container as a mascot?

<Snurks> holy god they're making a The Little Mermaid III
<MessedRawker> featuring a dead horse as a new co-star right?

<auto-jack> one of my users needs to disable their antivirus
<auto-jack> "to run a test."
<Redline> testing their will to be employed

<+Sythro00> Omg this is so messed up. I keep taking this
gender test at http://test.thespark.com/gendertest/ and it
keeps coming up with that it's 86% sure I am a girl, WTF
<@Jed-> Sythro00: maybe its right..
<+Sythro00> No thats whats so scrwewed up. I am totaly
right-winger, heck I collect Glocks for the love of god

<Sam_> hrmm help me come up with a new email address
<Sam_> i cant think of a clever name
<P|CK|E> Screwdriver Deluxe
<Sam_> im think TommySalami
<Sam_> or im gonna try to get Sam_
<P|CK|E> yeah
<P|CK|E> Sam_
<Sam_> i wish that was my name
<Sam_> my real name
<Sam_> actually i'd rather have it be @Sam_
<Sam_> so i have ops.

<@Ghostface> *aroused*
<@Ghostface> ./.
<@Ghostface> .|.

<Jess> can anyone even see what I am writing?
<GoddessAmadeo|TheImpaler> no ...
<Jess> OK
<Mike> no jess, you gotta do it different
<Jess> how can I then
<Jess> ?

<@neko|stoned> when i first got into warez, i downloaded
shindlers list
<@neko|stoned> i deleted it thinking it was a bad copy
<@neko|stoned> :/

* araignee doesn't care for DiCaprio.  He's not to her taste.
Rapunzel452: He used to be able to act.  Then he decided he
didn't need to anymore.  I have little respect for an actor
who lets himself get upstaged by a ship.
hetros: I believe his enormous head, while an religious object
in New Guinea, scares some folk.

*** Melchior ([email protected]) has joined
#allniterz
*** Ass-Mastah sets mode: +a Melchior
<Orlyx> lol
<Melchior> what
<Orlyx> ur hostmsak
<Tripper> Melchior you, my friend, are gay
<Orlyx> what happened?
<Orlyx> *** Melchior ([email protected]) has joined #
allniterz
<Orlyx> lol wtf
<Orlyx> whyd u get that as ur vhost
<Melchior> lol wtf!
<Orlyx> lol
<Melchior> i have no idea
<Orlyx> i bet if u quit and come back itll go away
<Melchior> i never saw it
*** Melchior ([email protected]) Quit (Quit:
)
<Orlyx> lmfao
<Orlyx> god i love him

<Bobo> Hobo-Niff, will you be my partner in dance dance
strangulation?

<locust> rockingham, where you can buy rohypnol and condoms in
a combo "party pack"

<[-FeC-]sKratch> PENISES
<[-FeC-]sKratch> random penis, sorry
<Kwyjimbo> i understand
<Kwyjimbo> i once did that while giving a speech in class...
<Kwyjimbo> i never did do to good in that class after that

< Teratogen> Never underestimate the bandwidth of a station
wagon filled with backup tapes.

<thebluetml> everyone doesn't like me
<thebluetml> so i told my mom
<thebluetml> and she said i was cool
<thebluetml> other than the fact i have glasses, acne and 6
fingers on my left hand.