bash.org archive

<InvaderZim> embrase man love
<Marticus> i dont love teh cock, sorry, zim
<InvaderZim> no no no
<InvaderZim> man love isn't cock love
<SectorX4> Only someone who loves the cock would know that

Tony``/#chat slams a motherboard over the|navigator's head
<the|navigator> You idiot! I could of built a computer with
that one.
<Tony``> no dice. it was an intel

<ginzo_> my company sponsored a 50 Cent/Jay-Z concert
<ginzo_> on july 9th
<ginzo_> hahhaahhaha
<ginzo_> WE ROCK
<therdrai|> ginzo - what company is this?
<ginzo_> Cincinnati Bell
<therdrai|> oh
<therdrai|> are your CEO's and upper management gonna attend
<ginzo_> but i bet the pres will
<ginzo_> he's very into hanging out with africans
<therdrai|> ha
<ginzo_> PR trip or something
<therdrai|> yea
<therdrai|> so he can say "look i'm not racist, fifty cents is
one of my best friends"

<Richard> i just got possibly the gayest email ever
<Richard> $mp3(Lolly - Micky,3m17s).rand
<Yates> well you managed to pick out possibly the gayest song
to go with it

<@daedreem> and he was sooo sweet...
<ShockSMX> i think it would be more romantic if some guys
pushed you off a cliff and he saved your life by jumping after
you with a parachute.
<situationist> we'll have to make do with what we got

(drifter) I broke my rioport player
(jafo) how?
(drifter) but I'm just gonna take it back to the store and get
it replaced
(jafo) trying to upload mpegs to it?
(drifter) plugged in the power source to the earphone jack.
(drifter) cos the power source looks like it goes there.

<SJr|Tecra> Someone say something to take my mind off the
pain.
<wizer> just pleasure your self you will feel better
* wizer brb
<arrow|> probably going to take his own advice

<sam> people seem to fear toilet seats like the damned plague
these days
<Ishap> They're staging rebellions
<MEEKS> If you had to put up with all that ass, wouldn't you?

<Kevin> dont you hate when yer penis hits the power button
when yer jerking off?

<ncc386> It seems to be an oral fixation that drives me to
smoke and when I quit 3 weeks ago I started eating more. If
that's the case there is a healther, cleaner, more fun oral
practice that could satisfy me.

<hippyjoe> anyone one of u guys tried viagra?
<Traeno> yea
<Traeno> i snort it every now and then
<hippyjoe> traeno i mean, take it then have sex
<hippyjoe> not take it then beat off

<Mitsune_Konno> Yeah, except starbucks sucks
<Mitsune_Konno> for some reason you can getevery color of
coffee except black

<@WoNkS> omg it came up already
<@motardo> your wang?

<Spazz> I saw the sign
<Spazz> and it openned up my eyes
<Spazz> I saw the sign
<[IX]Korup> i saw your mom, and it openned up my eyes, i saw
your mom. talk about scary. big fat and hairy.
<[IX]Korup> i remember saying that to my brother back in the
day

<DooD> why is it that it's always the biggest, ugliest,
burliest men that get gender reassignment surgery?
<DooD> i could see getting surgery if you're like, 5 foot 3
and look kinda like a girl...
<DooD> but all these 6'4" 250 pound men with stubble and a
voice deeper than james earl jones going "i feel like a woman
trapped in a man's body" ...
<suzu> if you're already feminine cute looking
<suzu> you wouldn't need the surgery
<DooD> suzu: sure you would
<DooD> get rid of the optional material
<suzu> no way
<suzu> cuz the pretty feminine ones
<suzu> would think "i'm so fucking sexy"
<DooD> would think "im so fucking sexy it's ok to have a
penis" ?

(XengeL|MakingAnimeVideos): omfg
(XengeL|MakingAnimeVideos): whose good with windows paint
program?
(nemesis): omfg
(nemesis): who isnt?

<FRoGGuM> So where the hell do u get this bot program?

<@ritual> life.
<@SharkDeath> Installed it about 20 minutes ago.
<@SharkDeath> Haven't played it yet tho.
<@ritual> got one hour 20 mins left on download

<miki> hey pinkmonkey has spelling and grammar mistakes in
it's summaries!
<miki> I don't even have to re-write it into my own words!

<napster> if you have issues w/ him, take them up in msg
<bill^> no prob
<bill^> actually, when he comes back to NJ I will take it up
with him with a baseball bat....
<napster> why is that?
<bill^> it is much more effective.

<hellraiser> dude theres shit more important than grls
<eV-RaVaGeD> dude shes fuckin hot and she wants me :)
<eV-RaVaGeD> and theres more to life than Q1DM Tourneys
<hellraiser> yeah rights its prolly jus some 30yr old fat guy
in his basement waitin to meet u somewhere to ass rape u in a
public bathroom n video tape it, make copies and sell em on
eBay for 9.99

<_Deathbr_> u can update ur sblive value or gamer to a live
5.1
<_Deathbr_> i saw that at friends house and i was like whoa..
u come across some kewl shit while lookn for eprom reading
writing info's
<travolta> you can also find a lot of cool pages if you search
for the word "the"

<shapr> how do I correctly display two byte fonts?
<liiwi> you take the first byte and display it
<liiwi> then you take the other byte and display it

<GRAYwolf> Because, you KNOW suburban Massachusetts is a key
terrorist target.
<GRAYwolf> We've got...  Uhm...  A bowling alley, out in
Cambridge?
<The_Freakazoid> in that case, they'll drop anthrax into your
tornadoes.
<GRAY|Myth3> Because if I don't play Myth 3 to
completion...then the terrorists...they've already won.
<The_Freakazoid> Yeah, I recently downloaded DW 1-4, because
if I die, I want to die having played some great NES games.

<Tyson> kegs rule
<Tyson> im gonna marry one
<Mousey> ill have an affair with it

<Deim0s|1980> Argghh. You don't wanna know what I just did.
And for the sake of my reputation, I ain't gonna tell ya.
Ever.

Kim: brb.. needta potty
Mike: well thank you for that info
Mike: my life is complete with the knowledge yer emptying yer
bladder right now
Mike: speaking of which.....
* Mike brb

<wild> i'm black from the waist down
<ryo-ohki> The lower half of your body smokes crack and
doesn't work ??

<Zug_REAL_ULTIMATE_MM> Just about anything flicks his switch.
However, it's not wired up to anything.

<skn3[ac]> ITS A RE-DESIGN
<Clubsoft> Its a FUCK-UP :P

<ph0x_> the best way to optimize a program for space is to
remove all spaces and tabs from the source code
<ph0x_> also don't use many lines,write everything on one
single line

<madslim> man i've drunk so much beer today
<madslim> i feel like i've put on 500 pounds
<cutwrk> ./nick madfat

omg omg wtf n00b: y'know what's hilarious?
omg omg wtf n00b: when people boast about what they do on the
internet
omg omg wtf n00b: "omg im so drunk right now i had like 20
captain morgans"
omg omg wtf n00b: and "omg im gonna get laid tonight its gonna
be amazing"
Americandude23: yeah.  thats why i dont use irc.

<Kalidor> [20:30] * Now talking in #lesbian
<Kalidor> i'm tempted to burst out with "something's fishy in
here"
<mebrillo> lol
<mebrillo> we pretended to be lesbians
<mebrillo> they sent us their pictures
<Kalidor> rofl
<Kalidor> and?
<mebrillo> most of them were fucking ugly
<mebrillo> but there were like 2 that were pretty good looking
<mebrillo> one fat chick sent herself naked
<mebrillo> I think that's when I decided to stop going there

* koin freaks.
<koin> Harry Potter porn X_x
<koin> Not what I was looking for. Well, not HP anyway. :P
<Solaris> Been there, done that, bought it.
<koin> You have HP porn?
<Solaris> No.
<koin> I was about to say...
<koin> ...Why aren't you shari- I mean <_< >_>

<downgrade> I should do something productive.
<downgrade> Is masturbation productive?
<downgrade> I guess it must be because it "produces" stuff

<Kibe-Work> btw
<Kibe-Work> wednesday adventure world
<Kibe-Work> my work is going
<Kibe-Work> well most of us
<Semicidal> AHehAEh cool]
<Psycho1> heh Internet admins at adventure world be like Black
people at a KKK meating.

<TigerSun> check this out people, I saw someone's greet line
on a bot today that
says "In God We Trust, everyone else get yourself an X.500
certificate"

<TheOracle> :
<TheOracle> WHY IS AIM A WHORE?
<jednet> she's young and needs the money

<@ElectroWaffle> i wanna see her stick a turkey leg in her
vagina then pull it out with out any meat on the bone.

166296586: Hello.. How are you? I hope great :-)
Lockee: hello, how are you?  i hope not another fucking
spambot
..... (some time later) .....
Lockee: aww cmon, that all you got?
Lockee: a single scripted annoying ass message?
Lockee: wait, i know
Lockee: damnit i'm stupid.....
Lockee: i just advertised this number as being active
Lockee: which means now your company can sell it to even LESS
scrupulous companies
Lockee: fuckmefuckmefuckme

<Ice_raven> um has anyone tried BearShare
<slash> it sounded a bit too faggotilicious for me
<Ice_raven> it is
<slash> okay, that's good.
<slash> no false advertising there!

<jstepka2> better than losing your virginity to a 17 yr old
midget at 22

* Techniq throws salt in FG's eyes
* FuNGuY throws ass in techo's dick

<pure_sin> oi!
<pure_sin> i nearly had a heart attack this morning:/
<pure_sin> i thought my computer died on me:~(
<st0w> wow... I'd hate to see what happens when your vibrator
batteries die

< Squishy> in trade i'd like your soul for my collection
< Whoregasm> he means "your dick" for "his anus"
< Squishy> i've got lots of souls from this channel

<poetic_toupet> i REALLY dont know what gives people the idea
that opers should be "fair"

<jimmie> i was gonna spell something with our inaddrs so when
you tracerouted
our network it said stuff

<@anorexicpoodle> so the cable modem is plugged directly into
your comp
<KooGooShii> lemme check
<KooGooShii> yup
<KooGooShii> i just unhooked it and checked
<FinalLancer> /notice me if you get it up, imma gonna be doing
stuffs
<KooGooShii> yet im still on the internet
<KooGooShii> isnt that weird
<@anorexicpoodle> uhh
<@anorexicpoodle> what port did you unhook
<KooGooShii> lets see how long i can go without my modem
plugged in before i get disconnected!
KooGooShii «[email protected]» has Quit iRC (Read error:
Connection reset by peer)

(djaby) ohh k me frm marz
(djaby) visit sum time...
(djaby) its a cooool place
(djaby) ur zip has sum ko0o0o00ol tackz...
(st0vbold) I thought so, since you can't spell shit's worth
(djaby) u there zip....
(djaby) this st0vbold iz borin2 talk wit..
(djaby) :)
(st0vbold) sure I am
(djaby) yeah but me like 2 speak eit borin ppl also...
(djaby) :)
(djaby) so u r in q plz wait...:)
(djaby) lol
(st0vbold) go back to dalnet
(djaby) cum into me chann sum time... me a op in it ... me vil
bann u in a sec ??? :)
(djaby) hey how cum u no me frm dalnet....

<Amuck50> my buddy shane just started contemplating what the
world would be like without boobs
<Amuck50> i think he just scared himself

<Azn> This guy came to our school, and talked to us about how
drinking and driving is bad...
<Azn> And he mentioned that if you are convicted, you will
have a breathalizer installed in your car, so you have to
breathe into a tube to start your car...
<Azn> And some guy shouted "What if you fart in it?"
<Azn> Everyone laughed, and the speaker looked pissed and said
"Well, gas expelled from the anus contains methane, not
alcohol.  It would be difficult for an intoxicated person to
perform such an action with their distorted hand-eye
cordination"

* stupidMM shoots Sio in the face
* Sio pulls out his awp - scopes twice - pulls the trigger and
head shots stupidMM
<stupidMM> hrm. not bad with someone who just got shot in the
face

<mos6581> i made a pornomovie once. though, i had such a small
budget that i couldn't afford to hire any actors, so i had to
act all alone. I gave the movie a name "hand".

gree: this girl asked me whats wrong, i told her im a
different man when i run linux

<+walken> Vlad, if you were a piece of software
<+walken> which one would you be?
<+shiwan> walken: Hmm. ICBM control software, so that I could
blow millions of men at once?

Tamer Brad: i got this cross necklace today
NoVwith a Bullet: ha ha ha, everyone's gonna think you just
love jesus
Tamer Brad: no, i hate him
Tamer Brad: that's why I carry it with me
Tamer Brad: so if I ever see him, I can nail him to it

<Zyrjello> Cancer patients are incapable of being nasty.
<Zyrjello> It's a law of life.
<MrPicso> I hope I get cancer so I can prove you wrong.

<Joe_> gheybot, life?
<gheyBot> life is all about lounging in front of the fireplace
w/ a wyse terminal

<evilbob> then you must not be gay!
<evilbob> because if you were, you'd be all over my ass like
butter over hot rolls.
<McGrue> Is your ass *that* hot?
<evilbob> no, but it has its own atmosphere.

<@Web> <Anastasia> fuck you
<@Web> russian men get upset easily

<Matrix_McCloud> cant you just leave        
<MidoriKid> Nope.  I have a four year contract.
<Oolong> you should get dishonorably discharged.
<Oolong> that way, you get to have anal sex, and leave    
<Oolong> it's a win-win situation

<NinjaRyu> I remember in sex ed in the 10th grade someone
actually asked whether the "pull-out" method was effective
birth control

<cool__G> I can define 1/0
<illusionz> liar
<BeZoAR> thats like trying to define illusionz sexuality

<Icedagger> this is still the best name i've ever found in
canada411... Harry Poon

<SROL> Alright! I just gave advice on which underwear/bra
combo to wear to a party to my New York ho :D
<TheBaskinator> What's his name?

<Lime> i still keep thinking youre a girl :|
<Pikaben> I wish I was :|

<Jon_R> OH NO
<Jon_R> my page crashes netscape!
<Jon_R> whatever shall I do

<Nephlite> I'm having problems compiling apache and php, can
you help?
<Dogz> Yea sure bud, whats up?
<Nephlite> Well it gives me an error when i compile
<Dogz> Did you check the site or the forums?
<Nephlite> Nope
<Dogz> rtfm!
<Nephlite> ./configure rtfm --prefix=/www --activate-module=
src/modules/php4/libphp4.a  ???
<Dogz>....