bash.org archive

<WTM2K> what if i sodomized a priest while the priest is
sodomizing an altar boy, WHILE the altar boy is sodomizing a
blind 3-legged kitten?
<Meatball> then you tape it and sell it on the black market
<Gentleman> yes
<[N]> yes tape it
<Gentleman> that is hell material
<Livewireo> Only if the kitten was dead

<Embercide> i'm just waiting to hear someone say "omg minkus
was trying to chat this chick up at a party and he told her
that he's a GM Sexpert"
<minkus> Embercide i don't think so :) i'd be more witty and
go "I have GM animal Taming and I allways wanted a babe like
you"

<c-rOCK> I CANT WAIT TO SEE THAT COLLEGE GIRL GET RAPED BY A
ALIIGATOR

<Ne0_Rat> we all know who the bitch is in the geek
relationships... whoever has the worse computer ;) J/K

<kerushixx> dude, i just saw a moth fart!
<tulam> 0_o
<tulam> how do you know it farted?
<kerushixx> it flew in a straight line

<Calisa> When you went to the IKEA in Pittsburgh, what was the
service like?
<Bubbaprog> the pitt store is great
<Bubbaprog> eat some swedish balls while you're there

<@PrincessLeia2> hmm, see the problem with computer
packrat'ism is i tend to keep all my computer documentation
together, no matter what it is, so it comes to be 2003 and i
find Myst install directions with my computer stuff
<@PrincessLeia2> yay for windows 3.1

<myst> FYI, it wasn't true love that called earlier, it was my
mom... lol

<aleks_> anybody know of a linux app that performs an
operation similar to windows XP's "bridge network"?
<@Lion-O> aleks_: first of all, what does that thing do ?
<PufF-> its a cheat to get around the 'hassle' of subnet'ing
<@Lion-O> aleks_: oh, then I have a solution. Cheat and ask a
real admin to set it up for you, then take the glory.  I guess
the app would be called "mail".

<freedumb> i just made dinner and broadcasted it "online"
<freedumb> im fucking E-Martha Stuart

<@Scarecr0w> Guest67082, we are the performers of a new play
called " You are a fuck-wit"... wanna join?
<Guest67082> ok

<LEPREHAUN> does anyone knows how backups are done in offices?
<Dazzlemar> slight of hand and mirrors

Albinogodzilla1: hes at a musical....yes I think hes gay...no
I cant prove it

(sean) OMFG
(sean) dominos came
(sean) and when dominos comes
(sean) sean cums
(BigRo2k2) ok, and what?
(BigRo2k2) ok buddy
(BigRo2k2) you are a little too excited for shitty pizza man

<+{R3D}Hurricane> Fly Delta. Cause everyone else is bankrupt.

<Thep> I want to clean up bio-waste
<Sora> Um.
<Sora> Hint: That involves other people's shit and piss.
<Sora> And amputees wiggling their stumps at you and moaning.
That always creeped me out.
<Thep> I'd like to retract my last statement during the minute
of 5:30 EST
<Sora> Ah ha ha
<Sora> Yeah.

<Wookie> gunkaaa??
<gunkbitch> gunkaaa is teh mastah haxor
<Wookie> gunkaaa??
<gunkbitch> gunkaaa: It's not rape if they can't say no.
<Wookie> :o
<gunkaaa> wtf
<gunkaaa> where did that come from

<Chubbzilla> omg
<Chubbzilla> MSN just offered me txt porn
<HKR|VC> !
<Chubbzilla> what the fuck is the world coming too
<Ruu> MSN isn't nearly as bad as ICQ
<Chubbzilla> no, but this is liek
<Chubbzilla> first one ever
<Chubbzilla> bcos i got the new msn messenger liek, an hour
ago
<Chubbzilla> it has great new features, liek txt porn
* HKR|VC downloads

<RichiH> then how did you find out?
<RichiH> i have ignored all ctcps
<aboman> Dazman found out utilizing his investigative skillz
<RichiH> anal probing?
<Dazman> WTF are you on about
<RichiH> no, i would of noticed

<Fabio> wooo 47.5$/g for international data from feb next
year.....
<Riqizeins_Aggilus> w00t
<Fabio> and they are complaining that mp3 and dvd rips cost
the movie industry soo much each year, then they go and do a
nice thing like make our downloads cheaper...
<Fabio> i love the way this world works
<Riqizeins_Aggilus> lol

<VirtualServ> -±- CurrentSong: Linkin Park - A Place For My
Head -±-
<[0G]ftwilli> told you Linkin Park was talking about sex the
whole time...

<@Evil_Ed> lets see...blowjob, or ircd.
<@Evil_Ed> hm.
<@Dianora> ircd sure is tough, lets go shopping!

<QuaKed_Oatmeal> Chop Suey > U!
<kiro> chop suey not as good as you say
<QuaKed_Oatmeal> yes
<QuaKed_Oatmeal> It is greater than you.
<kiro> fuck you
<Shatai> Man, Kyle is not greater than much. I am sure, from
your analysis, that there are complementary packets of ketchup
in fast-food restaurants that are "greater than" Kyle.
*** kiro has quit IRC
<QuaKed_Oatmeal> rofl
<Shatai> =^

<Schoonzie> dude
<Schoonzie> 16
<ApoIIyon> but like. cmon.. SHE IS SIXTEEN
<Schoonzie> getting her kit off
<Schoonzie> unpopular?
<Schoonzie> i dont think so
<ApoIIyon> illegal?
<ApoIIyon> i think so

<copland> some prefer masturbate than meeting with girls...
xvid vs cinema is the same in my eyes :)

<KidHype> <Razoola> Honey, they are picking on me again on the
rg boards
<KidHype> <Razoolas wife> Well i never...i will tell them how
awesome you are and that will show them
<KidHype> <Razoola> thanks hun, you rock *sniff*

<antivert> flah. semen's nasty.
<antivert> except.. on nachos..

<cinco`de`mayo> Are Mexicans really baptized in bean dip?
<cinco`de`mayo> Yes, but only because Jesus once said, Blessed
are the refried, for they shall inherit the southwest United
States.

(Pete767ca) @find futurama
(Pete767ca) !help
(Pete767ca) !helpserve
(Pete767ca) anybody know were I can get episodes online?
(iamhurtin) yeah type /quit accept futurama ep 01
quit: (Pete767ca) ([email protected])
(accept futurama ep 01)

(DownKaos): free phone sex....tight
(DownKaos): what is it
(dvast8): KIS-SASS
(DownKaos): I hate to think what your day job is with a phone
# like that
(dvast8): union rep
(DownKaos): so worse then a gay male prostitute

<Cheese> I'm going to Visit Canada one day anyway :/
<microburn> Cheese, we'll go drinking.
<Cheese> microburn, not until I'm like 23/24 ;s
<Cheese> What would be funny is
<Cheese> if we all still talk
<microburn> Cheese, : That would be sad if stayed on IRC for 8
more years talking to you all.
<Cheese> :s
* microburn commits suicide.
<Cheese> 8?
<microburn> I have 8.
<microburn> I'm 16.
<Cheese> microburn, I can't see a day when we still don't come
on IRC
<Cheese> we might have graphics then
<microburn> Graphics?
<muert0> yeah me dancin naked in a box to your left
* microburn quits IRC, now.

--- Bigchris[porn] is now known as Bigchris
<Bigchris> damn i hate this weather
<Bigchris> cant get it up

<didas>   ok when anyone sees nirvanas_owner i need them to
tel me to mail me
<AnnoyN_Princess> u want him to tell u to mail urself?

[NARHDD] Man Skunk I think your gay
[Skunk] thats nice but the only time i've ever come across gay
porn is accidentally.
[NARHDD] Its amazing how people always claim that their eyes
just wonder from a reg. porn site to a gay one (with help of
ctrl + F)
[Skunk] Man I knew I shouldve uninstalled VNC

<kisama> fuck english too
<kisama> the lesbian has us playing "mythology bingo"
<kisama> what the fuck is "mythology bingo"
<kisama> and those stuck upppppp ass bitches
<kisama> were getting into it
<kisama> "DAVID AND GOLIATH WERE COOL!"
<kisama> "OH YEAH, CUPID AND PSYCHE LOOK SOOOOOOOOO CUTE IN
THE BOOK!"
<kisama> "LIKE, YOU HAVE TO SEE THIS REALLY COOL STORY ABOUT
PROMETHEUS! HE GAVE US FIRE, WHAT A SWEET GUY!"

theDELIv3ranc3: omg
theDELIv3ranc3: this schematic said astable multivibrator
theDELIv3ranc3: and all I see is "ass vibrator"
theDELIv3ranc3: oh god
Vad3rZ: LMAO
theDELIv3ranc3: I hate bash

<PG> Cheryl Ann Araujo (1961-1986) was an American rape victim
<PG> what a title to have in your biography
<McKain> Cheryl Ann Araujo (1961-1986) Was THE American rape
victim.
<PG> the rape victim of a generation
<Bonaventure> a generation of rape

* darkLem is a little surprised with Kim Justice - Megatokyo
appears on his MiniDisc
* SirLudicrus is a little surprised with darkLem's grammar

<Jason> i've onyl done acid in my eye
<Jason> or snocapped my bud wit it
<Budda> fuck that shit its not gettin near my eyes
<Budda> i mean fuck my lungs
<Budda> but im keepin my eyes

<ex-machina> aha! I just switched the britney case for the
cracked alanis case! The angry canadian strikes again!

<Dracostian> i just saw the worst movie ever
<spanker> your birth?

<rocksicle> You know you use computers too much when your
doing something in real life, make a mistake, and try to press
ctrl-z.

<Loser> i just got an idea
<Loser> i bet noone's done this before
<Loser> get like 100 guys to come into a bottle
<Loser> and then pay a chick to drink it
<AlmtyBob> Loser: um, that's what bukkake is all about
<ryo-ohki> I have videos to prove it.
<ryo-ohki> We're talking like a fucking clear saucer FULL of
spooge
<ryo-ohki> Like, she could pour some cereal on it and still
not have enough cereal to finish the jizz off.

<mmm> i'm single and stuff
<Bobski> mettas relationships have an idle timer

<lilp00t> give me somin new to make fun of u for
<death2all82> ummmm i came in today and idled and u went on
for like 45mins. until i responde. then i left for a half an
hour and u were still going on talking to no1
<death2all82> now the fruitcake is PMing me

<Jeeeeebus> wtf
<Jeeeeebus> when I click the minimize button, it is minimizing
my cursor to the other side of the screen
<Yawgmoth> its a feature, not a bug.

<VonFluf08> crb - cheap digicam $500
<crb> Yeah, but id' want better
<VonFluf08> average digicam $800
<VonFluf08> good digi cam $2000
<VonFluf08> holiday porn - priceless

<TealShark> Valentine's Day used to rock: Going around all the
desks at elementary school, getting and receiving Valentine's
Day cards from students, young love blossoming at every turn.
Yes, 2002 was a very good year for me. :)

<@scifixi> dear irc,
<@scifixi> you are being boring.
<@scifixi> yours,
<@scifixi> scifixi

<shockf00> anyone know where the fuck i can DL a bot for irc?
<shockf00> isnt it like named Poloris or some shit?

<boii> i used to name a box after each girl i nailed
<boii> that way, whenever i nailed a new girl, id treat myself
to a new box

<neo-fs> does anyone have aim
<neo-fs> for the life of me i cant change my fucking password
<neo-fs> and its about to fucking piss me the fuck off
<gilma> my aim is good
<kryonik> my aim is good
<kryonik> when im whackin it
<kryonik> into some chicks mouth
<neo-fs> @_@
<neo-fs> your aim is weird

<FooMashoo> i wear my pants backwards <Bryan> is that so the
zipper is easier for your lover? <FooMashoo> yes

(TheOne) I wanna help at #nohacks
(@Matt) take the test, answer one question and you can get in
(@Matt) echo the time in red
(TheOne) .//echo -a $chr(3) $+ 4 $time
(TheOne) omg, so hard, i had to look at the help files </sarc>
(@Matt) its wrong
(TheOne) i think you will find its right
(@Matt) NO .. I R LEET SCRIPTER NOOB .. I WOULD KNOW
(@Matt) -noob

<ravuya> LIBERAL SOCIALIST MOTHERFUCKER PENGUINS ARE GOING TO
EAT MY CAPITALISM

* ^sensual_male^ is a sexy 20.m.melb, any mums or dads, wanna
watch me make love to their young daughter? msg me now

* Genin grabs laz and sticks his thumb up his butthole
<laz> at least i cut my fingernails yesterday

<Yo-DUH_87> next gen is here, but it isn't mature enough for
me yet
<Yo-DUH_87> the pci express motherboards and etc
<M[at]> heh, micheal jackson should use that excuse

*** Now talking in #bearcave
*** Topic is 'This is NOT a warez channel....'

<Spin0ut> ok, going to try the bed thing again <aNuBiS->
Spin0ut: Fucking your pillow till you bleed?

<pahol> As you use telnet in America how would you really 
hack in the UK?

(@DarkJedi) i hate when people IM you for no reason
(@DarkJedi) i hate talking about nothing
(+chumpman) unless they are hot girls
(+chumpman) then it's like
(+chumpman) keep talking bitch, and maybe I can get inside
your pants

<Edict> Ever tried combining two words to form a new one?
<Budda> Here's a new word for you : Seppukkake - Ritual
Suicide by the act of Bukkake o_O
<Edict> Eeeeewwww! :(

<DSmooth> u guys see Moby got beat up in Boston?
<DSmooth> i guess now if you are a superfan of an artist
<DSmooth> you stalk them
<DSmooth> then beat them up
<DSmooth> to show respect

<Confuzion> ok all females: 1) Get in fron of webcam 2) take
off shirt 3) focus on boobies 4) *click* 5) /dccsend confuzion
boobie.jpg 6) repeat process for bottom portion of body.
*note* do not mix up steps please follow corect order. thank
you.

* Joins: Ramza ([email protected])
<Ramza> jhzsdkjdsf
* Parts: Ramza ([email protected])
<Temujin> Why does he keep doing that...
<DopeHat> He's on crack.
<Temujin> ......
<Temujin> Canadians can't afford crack.
<Temujin> They smoke Clorox.

<nherzhul> I never realized how much my penis looks like
Barakka from Mortal Kombat.

souleman: doesn't everyone have a rag they use for cleaning up
after they make a mess?
Negative: I don't ;)
Negative: I never make a mess
souleman: haha
souleman: you don't get off?
Negative: I just open my mouth and aim ;)

<_Bas_> I want to be a database admin and part time mechanic
when I graduate