bash.org archive

<[BDT]Karma> put the chicken mushroom [ramen] outside
<[BDT]Karma> and wait with a club
<[BDT]Karma> maybe a squirrel will come by
<[BDT]Karma> and you will have food for another day

<DarkYouth> When you read your emails more often than you
masturbate, you may need to rethink your approach to life I
guess.
<Fes2001> or you need to masturbate more :P

<lux> everyone i know that smokes is tryin to quit
<zewm> i would like to lux
<zewm> especially since i hear it isn't cool anymore
<lux> i think lung cancer/$$ would be more of a motivation
<zewm> i don't care about that
<zewm> if lung cancer was cool, i would try to get it

<Seaf> I found someone had uploaded a video titled "REAL Muff
Diving." I'll leave it at that.
<Gau> erm
<Gau> did they go off a diving board?
<Gau> or was it their wife giving birth played in reverse
* Gau giggles at that idea
* Gau groans as the metal image sets in
<Gau> BRB... Malox time.
<SkySoldier> Gau, you are a strange man.

<JacksWastedLife> <----MsMarina
<kuribo> <----MsMarina
<torgo> <--- dumbass
<CactusJac> MsMarina---->
<Deathlove> <-- Spartacus

<BWieRDMaN> which one is the gay euro?
<scar-> <-

<MikeSweetser> I've seen DAP pics before.
<MikeSweetser> And DAFP pics as well.
<JamesFnX> Mike: DAFP?
<MikeSweetser> Double Anal Fist Penetration.
<P|MP> "find your keys yet?" :)

<DigDug> i have gay fantasies about every guy i meet
<DigDug> i try to take his picture
<DigDug> and then i masturbate to it
<DigDug> i have a whole archive of it on my hard drive
<DigDug> that's why i'm running out of space
<DigDug> not because i download warez

<PuchikoChan> it's like the least spoken strand of jewish
language
<PuchikoChan> like some kinda porno movie
<PuchikoChan> eerrr, disregard that last comment
<SkyLancer> err
* js8|finals wonders how tera went from linguistics to porn in
one sentence

<Nike> i went to see LoTR with the flu :P
<Nike> i was almost carried
<AardWolf> I tend to go with females... rather than sexless
diseases

<Hyperian> ono pike * Hyperian kills pike
<Hyperian> found an article about pikes
<Hyperian> "invasive northern pike just won't die"
<pike|zZz> MOUHAHAHA!
<Hyperian> "pike could devastate fisheries"
<pike|zZz> MOUHAHAHAAH!
<Hyperian> "despite being poisoned, shocked, netted, hooked,
and blown up, the nonative northern pike remains stronger than
ever in Lake Davis."
* Hyperian shocks and poisons pike
<pike|zZz> BWAHAHA
<pike|zZz> YOU CANNOT GET RID OF THE PIKE!
* pike|zZz was kicked by Dyn|work (Dyn|work)

<ohyeah> i hate sex.
<niggals> WHAT?!!! WHY?!!!!!!!!!!
<ohyeah> because it isn't moral and christian
<ohyeah> and its killing youth
<ohyeah> and its the cause for many diseases
<ohyeah> and so many people who are underage are having it
<niggals> well then how the fuck come your sn is 'oh yeah'
<ohyeah>  i can't talk to you!

<Vang> Ack!  I'm trapped in a bad Radio Shack commercial!
Vang suddenly calms down when he realizes his wife was once
Miss America and a Playboy Playmate.
<Shun> and then tense up again when you realize most of male
America has seen her naked
<Vang> Bah, who cares?  I'm the only one that sees her naked
right now. :)
<Shun> thats what you think ;)
<Kid_Chameleon> Not if you pay $14.95 for her WebCam

<sylwia> I'm drawing black people
<sylwia> for a poster for my english class
<sylwia> I think I made tham too black
<sylwia> you can't really see their faces

<DTARD> you havent peaked until youve had a conversation wth
the light barely shining through the comfortor draped over
your head while hanging off the top bunk and wearing plastic
vampire teeth

<HeadSoft> hehe amazing what a kinda catchy tune and a
ridiculous plot and some photoshop edited pics and too many
chat room addicts with nothing better to do... can do to make
something like a pop culture fad out of "all your base"

<Rigger> I was kinda shy, and still am, so right after sex, I
started getting dressed before she could turn on the
lights......
<Rigger> Well, she turns the light on, and I have my clothes
on already, and she can't find her undies.......
<Rigger> But she finds my undies next to the bed.
<Rigger> Guess whose undies I'm wearing?

<Milp> its the next hot thing
<bogueWRC> if your ass was the next hot thing, do you think
I'd want to get in and drive it?

<[BuD]> i think they should do a winona ryder game
<[BuD]> grand theft shopping

<KoS-> what the hell is a civic hx?
<matts> hx =hax0red

<Nettik> I had some Huge ass guy name Ray try to squeeze the
shit out of me
<Nettik> the guy is REAL strong and pretty agile for being big
<Nettik> he grabbe a hold of me and started squeezing, he
didnt like it when I kicked his leg out from underneath him
too much, but he squeezed harder.  It all depends on how far I
was willing to go
<spazzer> <Nettik> and soon i had a nice loaf the size of a
breadbox in my drawers

<madog> because your a little pee-on
<madog> who has no pull on this network
<madog> try it agian, ill make sure you're glined
* madog ([email protected]) Quit (Local kill by humble (no
pull on this network :)))

* Treiben has bargainname.com
Azi: how much are they?
Treiben: 8.95
Azi: same as godaddy then
Azi: actually, i'd register for a decade to take care of the
next 10 years at a cut rate
Azi: but i don't want to pay for 10 years and then have the
human race obliterate itself in 5
Azi: that would be just my luck

<JeffreyAtW> Heha, just played ParaParaParadise for the first
time
<JeffreyAtW> Probably my last time too. I alredy beat the
hardest song with no problem at all, and I'm not that good at
freestyling... nor have I ever seen anyone ever dancing
ParaPara
<Sumez> I am so amazed by your extreme geekiness
<JeffreyAtW> Yes. I have danced like a Japanese schoolgirl.

<DrZaius44> pc load letter? What the fuck is PC load letter??
<CharCoal69> a letter that says "I shot my load. Sorry. --
Your Computer"

<CoRDS> damn my cat is lazy, he is just lying on the bed
showing off his testicles
<|CluBCaT|> I was there about 10mins ago

<Chikster> Oh wow ur little comments can go fuck a goat.
<Chikster> LoL
<Chikster> now that i read what i said i see where u got that.
<BadCaleb> i'd pay to see that.. i can't explain why, though
<nyisles> text on a computer screen can't exactly have sex
with a goat...
<Chikster> well..true
<Chikster> but someday
<BadCaleb> in  aperfect world.. words will roam around,
fucking all sorts of animals
<BadCaleb> but not mine..

mattysteppo: tony its my bday
Agregz82: is it?
mattysteppo: yeah
mattysteppo: i'm 42
Agregz82: happy bday man
mattysteppo: thx
Agregz82: im gettin 2 teeth pulled today... so uhhhh thats
your present
mattysteppo: nice
mattysteppo: put em on a necklace for me

<Acela> +v means that the CIA now has a fix on your location

<MonkeyFlippers> Anyone know the capital of Croatia?
<gho5t> who cares?
<[steev]> MonkeyFlippers; google.com does
<MonkeyFlippers> Who cares, gho5t?
<gho5t> aww did i hurt your feelings?
<gho5t> i'm sorry i care
<gho5t> let's go look together
<gho5t> i'll meet you at google

<rogue2> a diablo SV just pulled in to my parking lot
<rogue2> it's michael bolton driving the diablo
<Snow> Did Michael Bolton really just drive a Lamborghini
Diablo into your parking lot?
<Snow> That's so absurd it's actually believable.
<Snow> Oh, I have to go. Edward James Olmos just pulled into
my drive way in a Panoz Roadster.

<pix[word]> anyone know how to search for 'c++' on google?  +
is an operator, and doesn't search for that
<cam[home]> search for "c++"
<pix[word]> i did
<pix[word]> does a search for "c "
<cam[home]> not when I did it
<cam[home]> http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&ie=UTF-8&oe=
UTF-8&q=%22c%2B%2B%22
<pix[word]> damn
<pix[word]> i did 'c++'
<pix[word]> not "c++"
<pix[word]> yarrr
<cam[home]> I'm e-mailing your boss telling him you can't even
use a search engine, so he needs to hire me

<Hanh> my mom aided in the development of the korean deathbox
<K> what is that?
<Hanh> Ford Ka
<Hanh> or anything from Daihatsu
<K> gah
<K> i remember that car.. didn't stick around for too long..
<K> your mom is in the auto industry then?
<Hanh> yes
<Hanh> mainly developing backseats
<Hanh> and breaking them in

<Kimmo> I don´t know you
<Kimmo> Are you good at something?
<Otto[NS]> Yes
<Kimmo> What?
<Otto[NS]> Dames
<Otto[NS]> *Games

< dadexter> I stopped using reiserfs because some of my data
went missing and my HDD died... ironic, isn't it?

<jitspoe> when I was little I had a wet dream... dreamed I was
taking a pee in the toilet only to wake up and find out it
wasn't the toilet I took the pee in...
<Pluto[BHG]> haha thats not a wet dream
<jitspoe> sure it is
<jitspoe> I was all wet :)

<+Torne> slackware isn't a desktop, it's just a fairytale for
naughty children
<+Torne> disable unneeded services in inetd.conf or slackware
will get you

<Mandi> kaff still looking at dicks?
<Kaff> nah sharks
<Mandi> same diff
<jamesn> cocks with teef
<Kaff> yeah they all make you bleed in the end

CcLpRPG:  it was like, my friend saw a chick at the movies,
but she had a boyfriend  
CcLpRPG:  My friend says, screw him  
CcLpRPG:  I say, you screw him, i'll screw her

<Akinaga> I skipped my wedding to play Tribes
<Akinaga> comeon, it was a match for the #2 spot
<apollyon> at that point you really need to rethink why you're
alive
<merc> or just dump the bitch =)

<BlinkingBear> 'manipulating' is a catholic term for
masturbation
<flawd_> !dict manipulation
<MarvinAndroid> - 2: the action of touching with the hands or
the skillful use of

<Vartia> by the way... reading the entire review for doom on
pcgamer... I could not find why they really gave it 94%
<eldeerk> you want to know why they gave it 94? they are all
giddy school girls sat infront of the screen gooo "ooooh doom
3, think he'll ask us to the prom, he so dreamy"

<endura> I like to get an idea of how easy itd be to get laid
if I walked onto a campus in a gorilla suit with a giant
banana as genitalia

<Junkz/#Overclockers> .com = community you n00b

<Ryk> after the man has shot his wad is the perfect time for
the woman to vacate the room and quietly catch up on a bit of
beaver bashing in the privacy of the kitchen.
<Tippytoes> shouldn't she have a satisfied afterglow?
<Ryk> she can glow when my dinner's ready.

<piman> Lindz: Does Ricky Martin scare you too?
<piman> Based on the way he dances, I think he's Steve
Ballmer's long lost twin...

<Jedisar> Moleculor: Now you see the world through my eyes.
<Moleculor> No. Because that would leave two gaping holes in
your head.

<LeelooMinai> Hmm, that Ian guy from Dangerous Prototypes is
kind of weird...
<IanWizard-Cloud> LeelooMinai: hmm?
<LeelooMinai> E, right... well... my cat wrote that - nm:p

<Cerebus> ravers don't go to heaven or hell, they go to
plurgatory  :(

TaipeiSS: o.o I love the Harvard common app supplement.
TaipeiSS: they don't ask you stupid gay questions that you
have to write essays to
zenith251: They don't want no Jibba Jabba.
TaipeiSS: the closest thing they ask is...
TaipeiSS: Briefly discuss one book that has strongly
influenced you.
TaipeiSS: Briefly discuss.
TaipeiSS: That's like, a paragraph or two.
zenith251: But halfway through the space they provide "We said
brief, damnit!"
TaipeiSS: Not "500 -750 words on a quote that means something
to your life and how you exude it in every situation" like
fuckin gayassed Cornell
zenith251: And if you keep going past that line, they don't
read it.
TaipeiSS: and they get this big purple stamp that says GAY
TaipeiSS: and they stamp it on that part of your essay and
print it and send it back to you in the mail
TaipeiSS: And they include a handwritten postit where they
laugh at you and say you have no friends.

<cdk> the computer admin at the office is just the kinda LINUX
0wnZ WIND0wZ nazi
<cdk> and he's goddamn paranoid
<cdk> and he smells
<@noosie> most linux guru's smell
<@noosie> linux before personal hygiene... that's their moto
<cdk> do most linux guru's whistle and make awful jokes and
hysterically laugh at their OWN jokes?

<Ban|Karma|> whats the differents between FreeBSD and Redhat?
<Mr_Tux> Ban|Karma|: One's free, the other's crap.  You
decide.
<StiNKy> redhat isn't free?

(monkeh^): this girl from the us was emailing me saying her
tummy hurts, out of curiosity i ask why its hurting
(monkeh^): i got the reply today
(monkeh^): and ill say this; she should have lied

<CoMBo> holded down is a word btw

<drwiii> Happiness is: seeing a news report about how the US
government stresses that the conflict in Iraq isn't motivated
by a need for "Christian dominance", followed by a commercial
for Time Life's "Worship Together" CD set.

<remix> i was gonna come back and say "fuck the children" but
i realized that it wouldnt sound too good
<ecoli> yeah
<melly> ic
<mkart64> yeah then you go to jail
<ecoli> besides, some of us are way ahead of you :D

[BiC]: i got a jobb! woohoo!
[x-im]: sw33t dude :) what kinda job?
[BiC]: warehouse-thingie-kinda job... :P
[Nemesis]: my job is living, and the payment is the job itself
;]
[x-im]: your getting rippedoff pal, go talk to the union.

<fai|ure> pearl must have some cavern pussy if she's wanting
it in the ass everytime
<pearl> i didnt say everytime
<pearl> occasionally is nice :)
<pearl> jd has the nicest thing to say about me usually
<fai|ure> i'm that sensitive type of guy
<fai|ure> ya' know what i'm sayin'
<Ginger> cavernous is not good
<Ginger> cept
<Ginger> for the esophageal capacity

<+N-Bomb|Super_Pants> You know what I find funny...
<+N-Bomb|Super_Pants> Companies like Sony
<+N-Bomb|Super_Pants> Who produce the copy protected CDs...
<+N-Bomb|Super_Pants> Yet also produce things which can crack
it
<@ketsugi|scanning> like marker pens?
<+N-Bomb|Super_Pants> CD-R drives
<@ketsugi|scanning> close enough

TwilightKnight: i fucking hate you so much
Dr SpaZZo: Thats what you get for breaking the goatse rules of
engagement
TwilightKnight: wtf are you talking about?
Dr SpaZZo: (Article 2, chapter 5, line 9: Sending goatse to
those of the female persuasion is forbidden)
TwilightKnight: heheheh

<GBD> I like you, I like you a lot.
<Judge> dude, we have never meant, how can you like me?
<GBD> I don't know.  I just have no real friends, so I thought
maybe you and I could be friends.

<kanzen> heh.. this guy's ont he phone calling his computer
pookie.. "Oh come
on pookie, you can do it pookie.. there you go pookie, thats
it... "

<ApoIIyon> energy drinks are good
<ApoIIyon> if u have less then 4 a day
<topdawg> i had a couple of v's in a lecture
<topdawg> then went to sleep
<topdawg> i woke up at the end
<ApoIIyon> yeah some people.. it wont work for them
<topdawg> and felt like running around in circles :(
<ApoIIyon> ahahahahahah
<topdawg> it had LAG
<topdawg> OH GOD
<topdawg> V ON DIALUP
<topdawg> :(

<Mosh76> TO ANYONE WHO KNOWS, HOW DO YOU STOP PEOPLE FROM
SENDING YOU UNWANTED CHAT MESSAGES PROMOTING THERE PORN SITES?
<Mosh76> Can someone tell me, or atleast tell me where to
look?
<eller> turn off your computer.

*** Joins: ph30tu5
([email protected])
*** Joins: ReadingZu ([email protected])
<ReadingZu> oh... wait
<ReadingZu> hey wait
<ReadingZu> i can be an ass all i want and you cant ban me
without banning her
<ReadingZu> HAHHADFH@Q$%&
<ReadingZu> OEND
*** c-rOCK sets mode: +b *!
[email protected]
*** ReadingZu was kicked by c-rOCK (banned.)

<jgaddis> boolean: I just got outta prison last Monday.
<boolean> jgaddis: how many people in jail use linux?

<SaxxonPike> I'm not gonna serve illegal stuff, just some MP3
files I got from Kazaa

<Mazhule> i can cook chinese ^_^
<CUI-> Mazhule: I never knew that you were a cannibal

* phieje ([email protected]) Quit (Quit: kersik putih net 1
pc 12)
<+otaku1> that signoff message really makes ya think
<+Dr`Device> Yeah.
<+Dr`Device> It makes me think "I'm sure glad i don't know
whatever the fuck language that is".