bash.org archive

<spazzer> i think i'm wearing my mom's pants right now
<spazzer> what the FUCK

<MrCoffee> Your mom is such a whore, if she was a chmod she'd
be 777 because everyone has access

<@freak> i now have a 'HEERZ WUT IM LISTANEN 2' plugin so i
can piss everyone off
* @freak listens to PUDDLE OF MUDD - BLURRY
<@freak> not even a kick? :(
<@freak> fine
<@freak> i'll do it
*** freak was kicked by freak (NO FAGS IN #WTF ASSHOLE)

<thunderka> somebody speak spanish?
<Suriv> i do
<thunderka> you do what?

<scabb> What's the difference between a Psychiatrist and a
Psychologist?
<MIiscool> I'm not sure, but I think the latter takes care of
easier problems, which can be fixed with medication, while the
former does the whole talking bit
<scabb> So if they were Pokemon, Psychologist would evolve
into Psychiatrist?
<Twilo> wouldn't you need a diploma stone to do it?
<Twilo> you have to trade psychiatrist to a different
university for him to evolve

(Elim) bah had to do finals today....finals there like sex, i
get done to quick, and i sit there quiet for an hour thinking
about what i did wrong...

<Caedar[SOT]> God, I hate people with no game experience who
work at game stores.
<Kaelo[LoR]> yeah me too Caedar[SOT] ... You want what?  Gay
Sex 2?
<Kaelo[LoR]> *sigh* nonono, DEUS EX 2

<Zeroblitzt> My seat at the Rush concert sucked :(
<TheDarthster> was it at the front?

<rellekmr> i'm all for promoting abstinence
<rellekmr> the more people who are abstinant the less pathetic
i look :)

<malkav> 96 kbps is cd quality
<sic> you must have cd's from mexico or something :[[

<Pookablu> Ron Dwight, the author of the RAR compression
format, passed away a few days ago. 
<ev> he was found in several same-size pieces and had to be
combined to put him in the coffin

<vermifuge> dude what the f
<vermifuge> 256 megs kingston for 20 dollars, shipped
<dr\gonzo> FOR LESS THAN A PILL OF ECSTACY YOU CAN HAVE 256MB
OF RAM

<IRh@x0r> h0w d0 1 g3t the m0d5 to @nsw3r my qu35+i0n?
<pualat166> stop talkin like a fucked up irc nerd fuckwit and
they will listen to you maybe
<IRh@x0r> 1337

<wilywampa> dazey said i'm almost out of money and said i need
to get a job
<wilywampa> i said i could steal money instead
<wilywampa> and she asked from whom
<wilywampa> i said "from old ladies, i can steal their money
and beat them to death"
<wilywampa> and she said "that's awful, why would you do
something like that?"
<wilywampa> i said "because babies don't have money"

<pixadel> Fine, Java MIGHT be a good example of what a
programming language should be like. But Java applications are
good examples of what applications SHOULDN'T be like.

<TAOC> EVILPIE WILL LEAD US INTO A NEW AGE OF ENLIGHTMENT AND
PEACE
<TAOC> somebody ban him

insaneFlash: man
insaneFlash: finals are taring me an ass
dogz: ah
dogz: man
dogz: are they gziping it as well?

<corey|sleepin> bush is on tv
<static> wut he sayin corey?
<corey|sleepin> 'all yer oil are belong to us'

<BriTnEy77> wait why cant i see anything the video like froze?
<CatsyTECH> Refresh your browser.
<BriTnEy77> how do i do that?
<CatsyTECH> I'm sorry, but you have failed the IQ test for
this chat room.

<MadHack-> i net 4200
<MadHack-> whereas i gross 6,666.66
<MadHack-> give or take
<MadHack-> quite the beastly salary
<MadHack-> 666 666 :(
<MadHack-> well, .67 i guess, technically
* MadHack- saves his soul through rounding

<bionicfen> OK I HONESTLY DON'T KNOW HOW TO BE CATHOLIC
<Sak> BW - Do everything you do now, except feel guilty about
it.

< RichiH> so, there was this big "companies tell you how great
they are" day, today. to make sure people went from stand to
stand, you had to pick up small stickers, put them on a A4
sheet and if you collected all of them, filled out your name,
et al, you had a chance to win a kickass laptop
< RichiH> when it was time for the drawing, the roon was
packed. i would guess about 1000 people, a bit more, perhaps..
< RichiH> they draw the winner and someone i personally can
not stand wins the laptop
< RichiH> he walks down to the laptop and is happy as a clam.
he needs to show his student id so they know he really does
study here
* RichiH hears needle drop, everyone is listening to me.
badger badger badger
< asg> yes
< asg> :)
< Phated> Go on.
< RichiH> so anyway, that guy mentions the id is from last
semester. the other guy says that should not be too much of a
problem and asks the room about it. not really serious, just a
side pun
< RichiH> about 1000 voices shout "NO!" at the same time
< RichiH> guy is sent back, another one is drawn, show over
< RichiH> we were laughing so hard.. :)

<SJr> ped did you know I am 1000 weeks old today
<SJr> Mook did you know I am 1000 weeks old today
<SJr> Mojo did you know I am 1000 weeks old today
<SJr> Liam did you know I am 1000 weeks old today
<Mook> no I didn't know that
<Mook> happy kiloweek

<b0b> i can impregnate from 10 meters
* felix takes a step back

<pork> all the chicks here are either really ugly, lesbian, or
men
<CardCheat> some are all three, pork
<Shovelbearer> uglesbimen

(@`H4X0R`) Rape is such a negative term, I think we should
call it "suprise sex"]

<MixieArmadillo> hahaha
<Mnementh4> if you tell me, I will have to commit sepuku
<MixieArmadillo> is that anything like oragami?
<Mnementh4> more messy, but the concept is basically the same

<Heather21> hi
<negativepositive> who are you?
<Heather21> just a wife home alone
<Heather21> hubby is out
<negativepositive> good - start cleaning the house before he
comes home and hits you some more

<skydrome> man why are there so many diff aur packages of
chromium :/ so confusing
<xhazk> skydrome: No manual entry for why are there so many
diff aur packages of chromium :/ so confusing

<Sugadon> sup
<Sugadon> i'm in houston
<GaBe-33> houston !?
<GaBe-33> what you doing in texas !?
<Sugadon> honeymoon
<drunkers> you came on mirc on your honeymoon?
<drunkers> the sex that bad?

Esi: people have installed linux on their Xboxes so...
Blayne: When people install Linux on their dishwasher, then
I'll give them a nod
Esi: is that a challenge?

<Loki> would dismantling a self-aware computer be considered
murder?
<Rane> Why don't you ask it?

<Lt Hawkins> someone from 127.0.0.1 keeps trying to hack me!
<Podex> You should send them a virus to destroy their
computer!!!!!!

<OneEyedJack> Someone tell me why everyone lists one of their
hobbies as either "hanging out" or "partying"?
<Qtechie> I like to hang out while I party... but chicks are
always grossed out by it, and guys tend to beat me up for it

<BlackDeth> "Disabling this device will cause it to stop
functioning. Is this what you want?"
<BlackDeth> hah
<BlackDeth> stupid

<AXiLLA> it feels like I need to do the dishes.. I'm drinking
juice out of an ashtray :[

<Jeff> :-(
<Jeff> :-(
<Jeff> : (
<cabbage> your nose fell off

<Kosh> Wait for the LotR cereal to come out... Frod-O's, with
a free prize ring inside

<TsN|EvilMonkey> hmm
<TsN|EvilMonkey> im having an orgasm
<TsN|EvilMonkey> wtf

<nail|away> Packaging systems are lame. Tarballs are lamer.
So is source. I install me software with personally
magnetized
needles and a steady hand.

<]RE[-NarcDog> damn thats a hard on...
<]RE[-NarcDog> one*

<EdiblePig> hey i got a story for y'all.
<EdiblePig> At a forum I moderate, i'll keep it nameless to
protect the stupid.
<EdiblePig> this freak posts, "I think the Harry Potter chick
is hot, am I sick?" and, I give this guy a chance right? Fuck
me for doing so.
<EdiblePig> i thought he thought she was pretty or sometjhign.
<EdiblePig> everyone replies, 'you are sick'
<EdiblePig> then, out of the blue, this guy says, "I want to
have hot steming sex with her." I shut the fucking post down
in a flash.
<EdiblePig> but i went and watched the chamber of secrets
today, and the harry potter chick IS prretty.
*EdiblePig takes a sip of bourbon
<EdiblePig> fuck

Petrosjko: How ya doin'?
Keucu: I had a complete nervous breakdown and tried to drive
my car off an overpass today and I think I scared the fuck out
of Julian.
Keucu: But I'm feeling better.

taz10021: sleeeeep
VindicateD: Writing Paaaaaper
taz100: lol
taz100: you're still awake?
taz100: heh
VindicateD: No...this is the world's smartest away message
talking.
VindicateD: ;)
taz100: not if you couldn't figure out that was rhetorical
taz100: ;-)
VindicateD: touche

<mojo>parents are weird
<mojo>So there I am playing my drums just now
<mojo>first im "skating on thin ice"
<mojo>and I keep going
<mojo>now aparently im "in hot water"
<mojo>go figure

<jeev> there are 2 things i hate in life
<jeev> racists and mexicans

<blazemore> one time i was camping with a bunch of friends and
me and this girl were sleeping next to each other and we were
both laying on our sides with our asses touching and i
accidentally farted

<BethOOC> If it were my dad, he'd be making jokes about being
hard-headed.
<BethOOC> After they amputated his toe he joked about having
to learn to count in base 19
<Rach> .....
<Rach> Your dad is a dork...

<osx> I programmed my sidewinder for IRC combat.
<osx> A for Awp, B for Ban, and C for Kick.
<osx> So watch out..

<WilBeDed> Anyone Alive?
<WooShell> no. i am sorry. everyone's dead at the moment.
please leave a requiem after the tone.

<thatbox> jpg artifacts are no fun for anyone!
<Binjuice> What about jpg archeologists?

<TwiLyght> Toby on @#gayphonesex @#gaydads4sons @#gayteensex @
#gayboysex @#gayteenboys
<TwiLyght> ack!
<TwiLyght> you dirtied my computer with /whois toby

<PowrSlave> Ah yes, everything I know I learned from Grand
Theft Auto 3. For example, if I need a ride across town and
there's a squad car nearby, I just punch the nearest old lady.
When the cops get out of their vehicle to fight me, I steal
the car. That gets me Warning Level 1, but all I have to do is
hide in an alleyway for 30 seconds and the cops will forget
all about me. Great learning tool.

<Amici|Kitty> 666 is the number of the beast ;P
<momo8D> 6667 is the number of you losing whatever social life
you might have had.

SleepyDog Two more generations and you'll be able to fit an
iPod in your rectum
SleepyDog comfortably

<Burned> Its stuff like the Columbia shuttle disaster that
really brings you down to earth

<prick> I hate parents who add letters to their kids'
otherwise normal names
<prick> Or change them
<prick> "JESSICKA" "TIPHANIE"
<prick> Do you really think that your child will be unique or
sparkling because of the confusion associatedwith their name?
<prick> All you're doing is setting her up for a lifetime of
spelling out her name to strangers

<ducks> HOLY SHIT
<ducks> THAT WAS A MILKSHAKE?!?!?!?!
<ducks> AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
<ducks> og my god. that was disgusting.
<ducks> I had this cup on my desk
<ducks> for a few months
<ducks> thinking there was soda in it
<ducks> IT WAS A MILKSHAKE

<Primo> If you can't beat your computer at chess, try
kickboxing.

<Maggieamac> I pray for Osama Bin Laden everynight for him to
give his life to Jesus
<dendr1te> I think he's given his life to Allah.
<Maggieamac> We'll see
<Maggieamac> But I pray for him everynight before I go to
sleep
<Maggieamac> :)
<dendr1te> Geez, I feel bad. I usually just masturbate before
I go to sleep.
<Maggieamac> It going to be ok
<Maggieamac> Tonight I'll pray for you

<robbie212> where are you getting this stuff?
<bahumbug> robbie212:
www.freedvdrsforpeoplethatarentjewish.com
<robbie212> it doesn't work
<bahumbug> you must be jewish

<@semi> heres the way I see it
<@semi> they say you are supposed to spend two months salary
on the ring
<@semi> better do that now when you are earning 50 bucks a
month

<mulambo`MoD> man
<mulambo`MoD> this dude is fucking everywhere
<mulambo`MoD> every channel i go to he's on
<mulambo`MoD> but he never talks to me
<mulambo`MoD> CHANSERV!!!!!!!!!!
<mulambo`MoD> HELLO!!!!!!!!!

<Aemon> so what do you do? network security?
<Dark_Knight> Information security/Network security
<Aemon> cool
<Aemon> i'm a lowly webdesigner/developer
<Dark_Knight> although having IRC on my box at work is a major
violation of the security policy
<Dark_Knight> but fuck it, I wrote it

<teknoho> im not drinking hard liquor for a lil while. i gave
it up for lent.
<mmmichael> what does lent do to you?
<mmmichael> does it fuck you up?

(|Chris) i've blown enough snot out of my nose today to make a
fucking bukkake film

Jesus: my girl mastrabates more then i do
Finque: seeing as how your girl is your hand, i'd like to hear
you explain that one

<Rach|Dressing > i just had the yummiest shower
<Rach|Dressing > it was nice and hot
<Fentom > ....damn it people prove that your hands ARE ON THE
KEYBOARD after that comment

<Daidoji> speaking of old nes games, I recall carrying out
clandestine operations in terms of game rentals
<Daidoji> for example, renting a copy of dragon warrior 4, and
swapping the chip with urban champion.
<Daidoji> I bet there are 5 or 6 kids who think dragon warrior
4 is the worst vs fighting game ever made